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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22379683">Ma chérie</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/huashan/pseuds/huashan'>huashan</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, Barebacking, Crossdressing, Friends With Benefits, Jrock - Freeform, M/M, Piercings, References to Drugs, Semi-Public Sex, also rock band au, catching feelings lol, in a bathroom stall, ksoo is a gothic/elegant lolita, self-indulgent and kinda lame</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 15:47:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>34,869</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22379683</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/huashan/pseuds/huashan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kyungsoo gets roped in a bet that involves his best friend, his most expensive gothic lolita dress and admitting to feelings that he's left to brew for way too long.</p><p>[ For "Crossdressing" in Top!soo Fest Round 3 ]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Zhang Yi Xing | Lay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>top!soo fest: round 3 (2019-2020)</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hello this is a completely self-indulgent mess. enjoy!<br/><a href="https://i.pinimg.com/originals/19/62/13/196213e9ed3ad412211d0a579693e166.jpg">gothic lolita ksoo rights</a></p><p>For anyone interested these are the songs mentioned in this chapter:<br/>Au revoir: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0pn0M1VIYI<br/>Dress: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMbyDfvdxjM</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hands roam over the ruffles on Kyungsoo’s chest, fingers try to sneak under his corset, but it’s tied too tight against Kyungsoo’s ribcage to let anything pass. Kyungsoo tries to steady himself on his platform shoes, regaining enough of his composure to get his key through the lock of his door.</p><p>“Kyungsoo, hurry…” A whiny, little whisper come from behind his back, Yixing’s voice is thin and light but it feels heavy and sticky on Kyungsoo’s neck, where his breath hits him.</p><p>“Minseok’s home tonight so…” Kyungsoo raises his index finger in front of his lips, gesturing to Yixing and wordlessly explaining that they’ll need to keep quiet.</p><p>“Okay.” Yixing nods distractedly, his eyelids open and close lazily, Kyungsoo stares at him with a bit of a heavy heart, it's already past two in the morning and he can only imagine how tired he must be, he wouldn’t mind just letting Yixing rest, instead of having sex with him. </p><p>Kyungsoo looks away from Yixing’s soft features and bites the inside of his cheek, a small, stoic self reproach. Their relationship is not like that, doing something that intimate wouldn’t make sense. Taking away the sex from their relationship would make them simple acquaintances at best, not the kind of friends that invite you over and let you crash on their bed with no kind of<em> benefit</em>.</p><p>Kyungsoo walks through the door and bends to undo the straps of his shoes, Yixing sits on the floor on his left, his hands move towards his own pointy boots, but they don’t do anything other than hold onto the zippers keeping them closed; their owner is too occupied with his insistent staring to make himself useful. Yixing seems to go a bit cross-eyed as he keeps coming closer to Kyungsoo, holding only a mere millimeter of distance between his and Kyungsoo's faces. Kyungsoo tries to ignore him, but soon Yixing’s hands abandon his shoes and settle around Kyungsoo's neck, he hears him breathe in deeply and feels his hands pull him downwards, so that he can let his lips skim over Kyungsoo's cheeks.</p><p>“I love when you wear dresses that cover you up like this, it’s sexy...” he continues to use his honey sweet voice to whisper his words and starts playing with the fabric around Kyungsoo’s neck “Like a gift ready to be unwrapped.” </p><p>Kyungsoo closes his eyes and kisses him, exhaling frustrated air through his nostrils and trying to stop Yixing from coming up with more embarrassing things to say. He can’t ignore what has already been said though and while he feels his ears grow hotter, he thinks how crazy it is that someone like Yixing, who wears the most shameless, revealing kind of clothes, can act like Kyungsoo, dressed up to look like a haunted porcelain doll, is one of the hottest thing he’s ever seen.</p><p>“After I take off your corset you should tie it on me and fuck me with just that on…” Yixing gets out quickly when Kyungsoo pulls back to breathe; Kyungsoo covers his mouth and hisses through his teeth begging him to stop riling him up when they’re still in the foyer and Yixing hasn’t even started to take off his shoes.</p><p>
  <br/>
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</p><p>⚜</p><p>
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  <br/>
</p><p>It’s seven in the morning when in Kyungsoo’s silent apartment echo the first notes of Malice Mizer’s <em> Au Revoir. </em></p><p>Gackt’s clear, soothing voice filters through his slumber, gently pulling him awake. The fog of sleep slowly dissipates as Kyungsoo opens his eyes and his senses adjust to the sight of the stray sun rays sneaking past the light, purple curtains; the clever morning light breaking the darkness that reigns in his room. He basks in the warmth of the voice sederading him and of his thick bed covers pulled up to his nose for a moment longer.</p><p>The song is supposed to be an alarm, although it’s not particularly efficient, considering that Kyungsoo lets it play completely every morning, resulting in him getting distracted and losing himself in the melody instead of starting with his day.  </p><p>He falls into the same trap this morning as well, his eyes closing just for a few moments longer, just to let to the song play and listen to it quietly. The rhythm is hypnotic, time seems to stretch around Kyungsoo and flow like the water of a pure mountain stream, lively and melancholic all at once, a reflection of the atmosphere of the song he is listening to.</p><p>The melody softly fades into silence and Kyungsoo feels like he’s touched heaven. </p><p>Finding the strength to pull the covers off himself proves difficult after that, but Kyungsoo manages to go through with it without too much trouble. He shudders lightly when his feet touch the cold floor and his body, which had been close to overheating, is attacked by the chilly air floating in the bedroom. Despite everything, his mood continues to be positive, ready to tackle the day.</p><p>Although, like most mornings, the atmosphere undergoes a dramatic change once Kyungsoo gets a hold of his phone and sees the numerous notifications, all a variation of senseless screaming and all coming from Baekhyun. He opens the messaging app to make out the reason behind today's breakdown and he’s not amused in the slightest when he finds out. Baekhyun did try to soften the blow with pictures of small teacup puppies and Kyungsoo appreciates the effort, but nothing could help him overcome the news that their manager has decided to double their work hours for today.</p><p>Kyungsoo has always made sure his schedule would be clear for his employer and yet this is how she repays him, with a sudden shift clashing with a Thursday afternoon filled with classes.</p><p>Kyungsoo groans, throws his phone behind himself and is startled by a small <em> ouch </em>following the soft thud of the device hitting something. Kyungsoo turns to look at Yixing and snorts at the image he finds. Meanwhile he’s had the presence of mind to get something to dress himself with, between him getting up to clean his face from his heavy makeup and their second round, Yixing refused all the shirts Kyungsoo tried to make him wear and now, just as expected, he’s shivering and whining, complaining about the temperature and the phone that landed shy of his face. Kyungsoo shakes his head and instead of showing mercy he tries to pull the covers off of him, he smiles as Yixing's fake high-pitched screams turn into his usual goofy laughter.</p><p>“I told you, you should have worn something.” Kyungsoo says, jokingly petulant, making fun of Yixing always helps to improve his mood. </p><p>“I wouldn’t be cold if you stayed in the bed for a bit longer.” Yixing grits his teeth and puts up an honorable fight, so Kyungsoo lets him keep the covers, even though he doesn’t really deserve them.</p><p>“No can do. I have the morning shift at work,” Kyungsoo scratches his head, he finds two bobby pins still nestles in his short hair “You should get dressed too or you might catch a cold...”. </p><p>Kyungsoo tries to make sense, but it’s hard to do with Yixing teasing him. He’s fought so hard to not let Kyungsoo take the covers away from him, but now he’s slowly letting them drift off his body. First letting them slowly fall down his right shoulder and instead of picking them up, he keeps moving until his right pec is peeking out of the fabric, Kyungsoo gulps at the sight of his already tiny nipple hardening and visibly becoming even smaller.</p><p>“Maybe you have a minute to spare?” Yixing’s actions are torturous and purposeful, making a show of his long, thin fingers appearing from under the the thick blue comforter and pulling it sideways, until Yixing’s right thigh is completely out.</p><p>Kyungsoo feels hot air being pushed out of his nose in loud, frustrated sighs, he gives in for a moment and grabs a mean handful of firm flesh. The smile that blossoms on Yixing’s face is radiant, but also showy and cunning. </p><p>Kyungsoo glares at him and pinches the underside of his thigh. Yixing jumps and in a flash all the exposed skin disappears under the covers once again.</p><p>“I don’t have time to waste in bed with you.” Kyungsoo pats Yixing’s leg from above the thick layer of fabric and gets on his feet.</p><p>“Wow… Waste? Really?” Yixing’s dry lips scrunch into an exaggerated pout completed by his eyes widening prettily, preposterously pitiful. Kyungsoo digests the merciless attack silently, Yixing’s messy bed hair, his cute face and his voice, his body, everything is attacking him all at once, after having just woken up and having received the worst kind of news. Although, even if Kyungsoo were in optimal conditions, Yixing would have been hard to beat anyway.</p><p>“No, but stop playing your cheap tricks on me, when you know that I’m busy.” Kyungsoo bends over the bed and kisses him swiftly, he masterfully dodges Yixing’s hands coming up to pose on his shoulders and turns around to walk to the bathroom among Yixing protests.</p><p>His steps echo loudly in the small, studio apartment as he walks past his roommate's bedroom, Minseok is putting on his wig, but he pauses to send a disapproving look in his direction, Kyungsoo bows his head "I had to listen to you two grunt through the wall and now I don't even get a spoken apology?"</p><p>"I'm sorry." Kyungsoo gets out easily and then walks off to the bathroom after Minseok dismisses him with a sigh and a flick of his hand. Kyungsoo makes a beeline for the shower, feeling the urge to wash away the sweat he worked up during the previous night, but also the dreadful feeling that comes with the knowledge that he’ll have a hellish day at work.</p><p>The shower is short and colder than he would have liked, but he accepts it silently, hoping that it will help him wake up faster and put him in peak condition for what is expecting him at his part-time job. He ties a towel around his hips and runs back to his room, wanting to cover up as soon as possible. Kyungsoo's newfound vitality deflates slightly once he notices that there’s no trace of Yixing left, he’s even rearranged the bedsheets in the same way Kyungsoo does every morning; such a skillful disappearance makes Kyungsoo question if he ever was there in the first place, or if he just dreamt him up. He looks away from the empty bed and forces himself to stop thinking about it.</p><p>He inhales deeply and feels the breath of life flow back in his lungs as he walks through the few steps standing between the threshold of his room and his wardrobe.</p><p>Kyungsoo releases a satisfied sigh as his hands grasp tightly the two golden handles shaped like lion heads and he pulls the doors of his second hand, french style wardrobe open, revealing his carefully pressed, perfectly organized clothes. The various shades of dark colours are divided in sections by their skirt length; each of the dresses is kept with an almost obsessive level of care. The same can’t be said about the boxes laying at the bottom of the closet, where his more casual clothes are crammed with no care.</p><p>His blood starts moving again though his freezing limbs as he grabs his newest purchase: a knee length, forest green, velvet dress. His heart speeds up as he presses his fingertips against the black lace that embellishes the rims around the neck and wrists, his eyes wander easily to the light shining off the dainty, metal crosses appliqués sewn along the lower end of the puffy skirt. </p><p>Begrudgingly, he skips his beloved dresses and reaches for the boxes. He rummages around until he gets a black shirt and sweatpants, the kind of thing he would never want to wear in public, but the time constraint forces him to use those as his everyday clothes. He can certainly appreciate how comfortable they are, but the lolita fashion enthusiast in him is disappointed and ashamed to not be able to wear the tailored masterpieces he keeps in his closet at every chance he gets.</p><p>He dresses quickly and avoids the mirrors on his way to the kitchen, eager to ignore what he's wearing, cook something for breakfast and then leave for work.</p><p>After wearing his classic, double breasted coat he glances at the mirror in his bathroom, making sure he’s at least presentable. He sighs, disappointed to no end with this reflection, but he raises his head and pushes his glasses up his nose, trying to distract himself from his clothes and the dark, heavy bags under his eyes; a gift from the three hours of sleep he’s gotten the night before. He smiles at himself in the reflection, it’s all kinds of creepy and weird and Kyungsoo feels like it’s the perfect representation of his current state of mind.</p><p>Just before closing the door, he turns back to look at the apartment. Dark and cold, the clean, minimal furniture barely stands out in the dim light coming from behind the curtains on the windows. It’s most likely just a suggestion caused by his less than ideal mood, but looking at his house feels scaringly similar to looking at a pair of sweatpants. One last glance, a worried hum and then there’s the sound of his door closing echoing in the empty stairwell, Kyungsoo discards his thoughts and starts walking.</p><p>Kyungsoo can’t wait for Friday to come, when he’ll be able to spoil himself and stop every kind of thinking with good music, cheap alcohol and most importantly, while wearing any piece of clothing he desires.</p><p>Whatever he will be wearing, certainly won’t look nor feel as cheap as his part-time job uniform. Kyungsoo says to himself, trying to cheer up and get himself through the afternoon shift after a slow morning of work.</p><p>“Kyungsoo is a waiter in a maid café by necessity and an inspired fashion design student by vocation. He struts through life in heavy, vertiginous platform boots, perfectly tailored dark satin dresses and a heart as dark and fragile as obsidian glass...” Kyungsoo can hear Baekhyun’s voice echo throughout the empty café and the annoying, continuous tapping of his fingers on the keys of his laptop.</p><p>“Baekhyun, if you don’t stop fucking around and start working, I’m going to tell boss and do all I can to get you fired.” Kyungsoo says pointedly, while he puts away the espresso cups, still warm from the dishwasher.</p><p>“Hey, hey… That’s a bit much, isn’t it? There’s still time until the lunch break hoards flood in and I have a creative writing assignment to finish for tomorrow.” Baekhyun doesn’t even pause to look at him, instead he continues typing down whatever abomination his brain is cooking “Should I change fragile with razor-sharp?” He scratches his freshly shaved chin with mockingly serious thoughtfulness. </p><p>“Baekhyun.” The firmness in Kyungsoo’s tone takes a few seconds to seep in, but as soon as his colleague receives the underlying threat, he stops the tapping on the keyboard, closes his laptop and gets to work without daring to add anything else. As he stands up, Kyungsoo looks over his form seriously, staring at every crease on his black skirt and the puffiness of the loose fabric covering his shoulders, his eyes get to his waist and what he finds makes him look away with a grimace. </p><p>Kyungsoo takes loud, heavy, high heeled steps towards Baekhyun, his friend turns to look at him with a full bodied flinch, hugging the broom in his hands like it will somehow defend him from Kyungsoo. </p><p>“You’re always so fucking sloppy, I can’t stand looking at you, the apron has to be tied in a bow, Baekhyun, a bow! Not a nest of knots!” Kyungsoo’s deep voice rages while his hands move quickly to redo the knot on Baekhyun’s apron</p><p>“That’s my charm, dumbass!” After Kyungsoo’s attack on his attire, Baekhyun suddenly regains all his confidence, his friend might be able to boss him around when it comes to most things, but Baekhyun’s maid abilities are not up for debate “My regulars want me to look sloppy and spill drinks on them, a perfect bow is going to intimidate them, I’m not here to live out my sadistic dreams like you.”</p><p>Kyungsoo pauses and crosses his arms “No, I’m not sadistic, I just get payed to be rude,” he says pointedly, it’s not his fault if the manager assigned him that role, he’s not exactly happy with having to step on people’s toes while he waits their table; unless they get handsy, then he is overjoyed to have the freedom to overstep the limits of a normal waiter, in every sense possible “But if you don’t stop being so annoying, I’ll show you what being sadistic really means.” Kyungsoo points at him as he feels the muscles of his face tighten; the way Baekhyun’s eyes widen make him realize that he must look a lot meaner than he had intended to.</p><p>Baekhyun hugs the broom tighter and nods, the quick bob of his head makes the loose blonde curls of his wig bounce over his shoulders “You’re too aggressive today!” he whines and moves his hand around like he is trying to swat a bug away “I was just playing around!”</p><p>“Yes, I know, sorry...” Kyungsoo’s feature relax again as he shakes his head, he passes his fingers through his straight, dark bangs tentatively, trying not to disturb the hairpins holding his wig and the full face of white paint he has on. “I had some important classes to attend today.” It’s even more infuriating when he thinks that he waits all week for his Thursday design classes and instead today he's stuck here working through someone else's shift “I’m tired, I want to go home and sleep.”</p><p>“Oh, I was about to say that you look kind of pale.” Baekhyun puts on a dumb grin and trails closely behind Kyungsoo while he walks back to the counter, not letting the chance to make fun of Kyungsoo’s thick, white layer of makeup pass him by.</p><p>“I didn’t have the patience to waste time blending concealers.” Kyungsoo sighs out, defeated, he hates wearing all this greasy, theater makeup in the store, whenever he does, he can’t stop worrying about his sweat and the central heating wiping it all away and transferring it onto the high collar of his uniform, or worse, onto a client.</p><p>“Oh,” Baekhyun tilts his head to peek at Kyungsoo’s face, his ash blonde eyebrows crease and his coral, glossy lips scrunch in a pout, his demeanor brightens up again just a moment later though “You share a few classes with Yixing, no? Why don’t you ask him to lend you his notes?”</p><p>Kyungsoo nods, of course he had already decided to do so, there was no reason for Baekhyun to bring it up.</p><p>“And you can take him back home for a study date? Maybe cook him a nice dinner?” So, there was a reason after all. Baekhyun raises his hands, making himself look as innocent as possible, even with his annoying smirk betraying him "Just a suggestion."</p><p>Lately, Baekhyun has been pestering Kyungsoo with talks of dates and romance, he just can't come to terms with the fact that Kyungsoo is having a taste of a commitment-free relationship.</p><p>Kyungsoo doesn't humor him and can feel his eyes light with the most intimidating kind of look “Go back to work.”</p><p>“Ok…” Baekhyun scurries away, once again holding up the broom in self defense “I’m just giving you some sound advice, though?” he laughs, “I’m not the only one that thinks that it’s kind of rude of you to keep fucking him and never even buy him a drink.” He raises his eyebrows and looks Kyungsoo up and down, making sure that it’s as clear as possible that he’s judging him.</p><p>“No, you’re the only one that thinks that... And it’s starting to get annoying.” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes as he disappears behind the counter, bending down to check if anything is missing from the small fridge that they keep there “I’m not interested, I’m sure Yixing isn’t either.”</p><p>“You miss Jongin’s D&amp;D nights to stay with him! What have you become?!” Baekhyun shouts dramatically and leaves the broom perched against one of the pink, square tables, it slips off after he takes two steps, but his careless demeanor shows he doesn’t even think about turning around and getting it off the floor.  </p><p>“Come on, we’re all happy for you two, but we’re also really nosy and we deserve to know if you’re dating.” he says the last part like he’s letting Kyungsoo into a big secret. The only takeaway Kyungsoo gets from this conversation is that deciding to skip the D&amp;D nights was a good call. “Look, I’m just saying that it’s been almost two years since Sehun dumped you <em> and </em>you’ve been seeing Yixing for a couple of months already.”</p><p>“I wasn’t dumped.” He was 100% dumped and the way in which it happened has left behind deep-rooted uncertainties that have been hard to overcome, “I’m not in the mood to be in an actual relationship right now.” Kyungsoo enjoys going on cute, platonic dates, but a relationship only based on sex makes him feel safer, less of his feelings being involved means less wounds to heal when everything will inevitably come to an end. </p><p>“Let’s make a bet, if you get together with him by the end of the year, you’ll lend me your sixty thousand yen Moi-même-Moitié dress anytime I ask for it.” Baekhyun keeps talking and talking like he doesn’t have an entire café to sweep. </p><p>“You can forget about it.” Kyungsoo deadpans, condemning the idea to the pile of other ignored, useless ideas Baekhyun dumps on him daily. He won’t let Baekhyun’s sticky little hands pry in his relationships and he’ll take all the precautions to make sure they’ll also stay away from his fanciest, most beloved dress.</p><p>
  <br/>
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</p><p>⚜</p><p>
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</p><p>Kyungsoo shivers as he steps over melting snow, just seeing it is enough to make the temperature of his already freezing body plummet. He burrows his face into the thick fabric of his scarf, but breathing into it pushes hot air against his glasses, making the lenses fog and deprive him of his sight.</p><p>He walks briskly through the small distance between the station and his university, he’s not particularly excited by the prospect of having to sit through two hours of contemporary history, but at least he won’t be freezing to death outside.</p><p>Walking into the classroom feels like having an outer body experience, all it takes is one step over the threshold for Kyungsoo’s face to be hit by blissful warmth. The frost sitting on his skin melts away and he regains full ownership of his frigid hands, the fingers that had seemed as stiff as ice finally turn back to a more human-like consistency.</p><p>Kyungsoo feels himself smile as he begins to move again and direct himself to take a seat in one of the middle rows, he settles down in the second seat leaving a spot to his left free, as he usually does when he has a class that he shares with someone that he expects to sit near him.</p><p>He looks around curiously, not surprised to see that Yixing hasn’t arrived yet. </p><p>Kyungsoo turns back, to quietly take out his things and continue waiting for the professor to show up. A few minutes have already passed, when he’s startled by a large, moving leopard print stain taking the seat on his left, Kyungsoo can tell who it is even without being able to see his face, he turns to look at Yixing as he dumps his large, purple backpack on the table in front of them and starts pulling out books and a handful of pens, he has to fish for them one by one from the mess hiding inside his bag. </p><p>The oversized leopard hoodie shifts and finally a familiar face peeks out of it and turns to look at Kyungsoo “Hi!” the whisper is accompanied by a small smile and Kyungsoo hums, he grows a bit tense, looking away from Yixing’s dimpled cheeks to satisfy the sudden need to scratch his nose and hide.</p><p>The professor has arrived and is getting ready, but instead of looking at her, Kyungsoo is distracted by Yixing tugging on the black, long sleeve of his sweater insistently “Say hi back, don’t be rude…” he whines and already pushes his body against Kyungsoo’s side, usually he waits for the classes to get boring to become this clingy, but he seems to have decided to skip the wait today.</p><p>When he’s around him, Kyungsoo feels the most and least comfortable he’s ever been, Yixing's presence translates in his mind with pure chaos and confusion. Kyungsoo’s head goes into havoc whenever they’re alone together, but he is not bothered by it; actually, it’s more like an addictive, strange, yet pleasant sensation.</p><p>“...Hi.” Kyungsoo’s deep voice comes out sounding strained and echoes loudly in the half empty, silent room, the professor raises her head with an eyebrow arched up to her hairline and looks directly at him, he can tell she’s definitely not the only one, seeing as Kyungsoo feels several pairs of eyes direct their attention at him. Out of everyone, Yixing is the one who acts as if he didn’t notice, he continues to get books and coloured pens out of his backpack without an itch, even as Kyungsoo silently dies of embarrassment beside him.</p><p>They’re ten minutes into the lesson when Yixing speaks up again “Do you want to get tea after this?” Yixing gets so close to him, too close, his chest sticking to Kyungsoo’s arm. Before answering, Kyungsoo scrunches his nose and pursues his lips, one of his small nervous habits,</p><p>“Sorry, I can’t, I have a shift at work…” he rejoys when this time his voice comes out more naturally.</p><p>“This is already the second time you're turning me down…” Yixing’s lips jut out in a pout and his chin settles on Kyungsoo’s shoulder, then his hands come up to circle Kyungsoo’s forearm and he lets them go a little limp, having Kyungsoo handle their light weight “Maybe I'll have tea at your part-time job then…”</p><p>Kyungsoo's eyebrows furrow at that. Sure, he drinks tea with Yixing sometimes, but what's rare is him insisting after being turned down. This is new and it sends thoughts swirling around in Kyungsoo's head, but he doesn't allow himself to grasp any of them. Since the beginning, Yixing has never been insistent about anything, they always let favorable situations come to life on their own accord with no external pressure, what they share is easy and free, things happen only if they're meant to be.</p><p>He’s probably just reading too far into it. It’s all Baekhyun and his stupid bet’s fault.</p><p>Kyungsoo can still remember perfectly the first time him and Yixing crossed the limits of simple acquaintances and pushed their hands in each other’s underwear. Up until the moment Yixing dragged him in the Exoplanet restroom, Kyungsoo thought he was being made fun of. Even now the whole ordeal still feels absurd to him: the fact that someone like Yixing would hit on someone like him is hard to believe, especially after Sehun dumped him and made sure to stress just how boring it was to be in a relationship with him.</p><p>Yixing is in a band, has a million different part-time jobs, he seems to never run out of stories to tell. His talent and passion for music are enviable and have pushed him to move out of his country and enroll in a foreign university before turning twenty; his life is like an adventure and Kyungsoo can say with no doubts that he's the most interesting person he's ever met, which is what makes him unable to pinpoint the reason why Yixing would be compelled to spend time with him.</p><p>The circle of people that go to Exoplanet to attend the nights devoted to jrock is quite small, so Kyungsoo already knew Yixing vaguely even before officially meeting him. He had seen him perform on stage and occasionally had strong opinions about his extravagant fashion sense, but also about his talent and, even though it’s weird to admit, about his appearance as well. He never felt the need to make any of them explicit to anyone, though, since Baekhyun’s loud screams of appreciation, sometimes bordering into harassment, used to be more than enough for both of them.</p><p>Everything changed in a blink of an eye, when Chanyeol, the drummer of Yixing’s band, started working at his same crossdresser café and suddenly someone that seemed completely far and unreachable was sitting at his same table, brushing his ugly shoes against his calves and subtly inviting him to a joint bathroom break.</p><p>The first few times it happened, they barely even talked, everything was fast and messy, two of the things that Kyungsoo hates the most, but which became laughably easy to ignore after he got hooked on Yixing’s light voice in his ears and the feeling of his supple body giving under the pressure of his fingertips. </p><p>Soon enough they exchanged numbers and started to prefer fucking on Kyungsoo’s bed instead of jerking each other off in the run-down bathroom of their favorite club.</p><p>The relationship between them has been left unlabeled and free of restrictions, Kyungsoo can only imagine how many more people Yixing keeps wrapped around his little finger and right now Kyungsoo has no problem with being just one of them.</p><p>He glances at Yixing, still leaning against him, he notices him immediately and turns to him to show him a silly face. He’s as handsome as always, but the tiredness is apparent in his features: his eyes are slightly red and the bags underneath them are heavier than Kyungsoo has ever seen them, his entire face looks paler and his gaze less alert than they usually do.</p><p>Kyungsoo is aware that Yixing juggles a myriad of different part time jobs, although he doesn't know the reason why he insists on doing it. He can understand wanting to save up some money, but he's not sure that extra money will be worth it if he ends up collapsing from overwork.</p><p>Kyungsoo isn’t really one to judge people without confronting them directly, not even in the privacy of his own head, but seeing such clear signs of exhaustion on Yixing worries his softer, caring side; he can’t help himself.</p><p>He would be just as worried for any of his friends, the only difference is that he doesn't know if the relationship he shares with Yixing allows this kind of meddling. To not take a misstep, he just keeps quiet, opting to share his thoughts about Yixing’s condition subtly.</p><p>“No,” for the second time, Kyungsoo’s dark voice interrupts the quietness in the room loudly enough to alert the professor. This time, though, Yixing turns to look at him, his light eyebrows furrow and his lips turn into a frown “You look tired you should go back home and sleep.”</p><p>So much for being subtle.</p><p>“I can’t,” Yixing grumbles, “I have class after this.” Yixing detaches himself from Kyungsoo, he props his elbow on the desk and rests his chin on the palm of his hand, a hard look morphs his features.</p><p>Kyungsoo looks at him in silence for a few seconds. He half expects Yixing to call him annoying and meddlesome, but he doesn’t, he just stays quiet and goes back to paying attention to the professor.</p><p>Kyungsoo misses having him close, but judging by the shift in the mood, he guesses he’s walked right past one of the unspoken limits of their relationship. He feels dumb, but he's accepted that he'll never win the war against his loose filters. He's usually proud of his straightforwardness, but now he's regretting not keeping his mouth shut. He looks at Yixing’s tired eyes, his unruly bedhead and his ugly, obnoxious clothes one last time and then turns away from him, focusing on the lesson.</p><p>
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</p><p>Slowly but surely, Friday comes along and by ten p.m. Kyungsoo has his makeup on and his brand new forest green, velvet dress zipped up and perfectly fitted on his body. He finally feels a bit like himself again, it would have been better if his new wig didn’t feel so tight to make him fear for his skull, but he doesn’t find it in himself to complain too much after having to be seen around wearing sweatpants.</p><p>Walking to the station is always a bit awkward, usually there are other people in full lolita attire, but the overwhelming majority is composed of the kind of people that try not to be caught staring or just wait for him to walk past them to laugh among themselves.</p><p>He wishes these late evening journeys could feel a bit more <em> usual </em>, walking out of home in your favourite clothes shouldn’t feel like a statement, it’s supposed to be a normal thing that everyone gets to do; not something to point at and laugh, nor some grand, liberating event. </p><p>Despite everything surrounding him, Kyungsoo keeps his shoulders straight and walks silently to the subway, reminding himself to ignore all the attention he attracts. He waits by the doors for his stop and then walks out with only his destination in mind and nothing else. </p><p>“Kyungsoo!” Kyungsoo hears his name as he walks into the club, he turns to the right, towards the area occupied by the stinky fuschia couches and low tables. Baekhyun is moving his arms from side to side, as if Kyungsoo could miss his bright orange dress and fluffed, short, curly pigtails amidst the muted colors of the other clients’ clothes.</p><p>Kyungsoo crosses the small distance between them, as he gets closer he starts to make out Junmyeon and Minseok with a glass in hand each and squished up on the stained, bright pink cushions.</p><p>“We already got your water.” Baekhyun has a wide smile on while he points at a tall glass sitting on the table in front of them, the liquid inside is a fluorescent blue, absolutely not water.</p><p>“I’m not drinking your shitty fruity drinks, you know they make me sick.” Kyungsoo raises the glass to his nose anyways, just out of curiosity he tries to get a whiff of its scent “Gross.”, it's like inhaling pure sugar mixed with vodka, he grimaces, putting the glass back down, all while Baekhyun keeps pointing at his expression and laughing.</p><p>Kyungsoo gets back on his black platform boots and elbows his way through the crowd of swaying drunks to reach the bar. He has to repeat the order three times before the waiter is able to understand him over the screamo section of the song being performed on the small stage to their right.</p><p>As he waits, Kyungsoo turns to look at the band, more interested in what they’re wearing than the music they’re playing. It’s pretty standard visual kei clothing: checkered pants, school uniform skirts over pants, pins and shirts with detachable sleeves; stuff that 90% of the bands performing here likes to wear. </p><p>He loses his focus easily, being distracted by someone passing by just a few steps away from him. The shine of their latex pants genuinely has his skin crawling, Kyungsoo can’t believe what he’s seeing when his eyes trail down and find the ugliest pair of pointy, white boots he’s ever seen. </p><p>Belatedly, Kyungsoo realizes that the stranger is not moving anymore and when he finally stops trying to incinerate those shoes with his eyes, his gaze trails up slowly. A spark of realization goes off in his brain at the sight of the snakeskin print of the person’s shirt and the way it’s barely hanging onto his body, with only a couple of buttons secured into their eyelets.</p><p>Once Kyungsoo’s eyes reach his face, Yixing seems confused, Kyungsoo would probably feel the same if, out of nowhere, someone had just started to stare at him so openly and insistently. He feels like a weirdo, but his <em> shock </em> is <em> incommensurable </em> and staring and judging is the way his instincts react to it. His eyes feel like they’re burning as he also notices the amount of accessories crowding around his neck and ears.</p><p>Yixing looks down and raises a side of his shirt, his thin, light eyebrows furrow “Like what you see?” he asks, the awkwardness from their last meeting has dissipated and left nothing behind. </p><p>Yixing’s not wearing any eye catching makeup, but Kyungsoo’s eyes are glued to his lips anyway, they’re not as moisturised as they could have been, but they still look soft. Actually, all his features look really gentle and soft, if he weren’t dressed like a complete clown, he would reach godlike levels of beauty.</p><p>“I'm amazed by how many ugly pieces of clothing you’ve been able to wear in just one night, congratulations.” Kyungsoo detaches himself from the bar, almost forgetting his drink, and struts past Yixing foregoing any kind of further contact.</p><p>“I know you don't mean that!” he hears saying among the laughing coming from behind his back. He feels bad, he hopes he didn't sound harsh, but he won’t ever be caught complimenting anyone that decides to willingly wear latex, unless they’re current or ex Malice Mizer members, the only beings above Kyungsoo’s strict fashion preferences.</p><p>“What was that? Already ditching us for your dick appointment?” Jongdae has arrived while Kyungsoo was away and he’s the first one to speak once Kyungsoo is within earshot, he’s wiggling his half shaved eyebrows, his tone is annoyingly suggestive.</p><p>“No, I just had to stop to comment the worst outfit I’ve seen in a long time.” he finally sits back down and sips on his drink,</p><p>“Interesting…” Baekhyun’s staring at Kyungsoo from above the rim of his glass of fluorescent, sickeningly sweet, alcoholic mixture. The image of him sipping from it is enough to make the hair on Kyungsoo’s nape stand up “I think he looks hot.”</p><p>“Of course you do,” Minseok rolls his eyes and smooths his skirt over his thighs, the image is like a palate cleanser for Kyungsoo: no wrinkles no mismatched prints, just tasteful ruffles and high quality fabric, absolutely wonderful.</p><p>“Hi! We’re The Peaches!” Kyungsoo is startled by the familiar voice speaking into the microphone,</p><p>“Uh! It's them!” Baekhyun stands up and claps his hands quickly, his long, bedazzled acrylic nails clack against each other, the sound has everyone cringing in pain “Yixing! You look so hot!” he cups his hands around his mouth to not let anyone miss his screaming.</p><p>Kyungsoo turns as a synth starts playing, it’s Buck-Tick’s Dress, a song that gets performed so much in the club that Kyungsoo has become able to recognize it just from its first two notes. Normally he’d just turn back towards his friends and listen to it mindlessly, but he has never seen Yixing and his band perform this song before, he's looking forward to see what his rendition will sound and look like.</p><p>He can’t see Chanyeol, the drummer, from where he’s sitting, but he hears their sticks lightly hit the cymbals and then start with the actual percussions, in time with the familiar riff of the guitars and an unnecessarily lecherous sigh, delivered by Yixing with half-closed eyes and that infuriatingly ugly brown, snake skin shirt, now completely fallen off of his right shoulder. The dip just above his collarbones is impossible to resist, perfect to bite down and mark. Kyungsoo gulps around nothing, on his tongue still lingers the bitterness of the alcohol and the ghost of the taste of Yixing's skin.</p><p>The intro continues playing as Yixing grasps his own shoulders, his dark hair slowly unravels from behind his ears and covers his eyes, just as all the lights in the room turn even dimmer and tinted by purple.</p><p>No matter how much it embarrasses Kyungsoo, he doesn’t look away, continues to stare, just as he had done while leaning on the bar, making fun of the same Yixing that now has him hanging from his lips. He absolutely means it <em> literally </em>, seeing as just as he starts singing, Kyungsoo’s stomach seems to empty and a shudder, that has nothing to do with fear of questionable fashion choices, rushes over his skin.</p><p>Kyungsoo can see from the corner of his eye his entire friends’ group mouthing the lyrics, even though they’ve mostly gone back to minding their own business; everyone except for Baekhyun and himself, who are still fully facing the stage.</p><p>The voice is kept low and quiet, like the original, even if his tone isn’t as dark as Atsushi Sakurai’s. Yixing takes slow, lazy steps as his hands continue to roam his own chest, his throat, his thighs over the dreadful, skin tight, black latex pants.</p><p>Kyungsoo gulps around nothing, his throat is parched, dried up completely. He feels like he’s losing something by catching himself admitting to this so easily, but Yixing is <em>unbearably</em> <em>attractive</em> and Kyungsoo needs to accept how weak he is to his charm. </p><p>He looks away out of spite, his hands reach for his glass. He can tell someone’s drank out of it, most likely Jongdae, but he skips the complaints to down what’s left of the dark liquid; unfortunately most of it is deviated into the wrong side of his throat by Baekhyun, who starts hitting Kyungsoo’s back out of the blue. His high-pitched screaming covers the noisy coughing coming from Kyungsoo's chocking and the sound of Jongdae hitting his chest, in an useless attempt at aiding him, eventually Junmyeon has to stand up and offer him some water and this last intervention is what makes Baekhyun realize what he’s done. </p><p>Even after having realized, he doesn’t acknowledges it at all, “Oh.” Baekhyun’s still hitting his back “<em>Oh! </em>Look!” </p><p>Kyungsoo turns to look at him, ready to sever all ties with him, but the scene on the stage demands his attention and he can’t do anything other than train his eyes back to the people basking in the purple stage lights.</p><p>Yixing is on his knees and that’s enough to make Kyungsoo think that he should look away immediately, but then he’s taken again, once he sees one of the guitarists, Ronghao, grab the strap of his guitar and pull on it to get the instrument behind his back. He walks to Yixing’s right, bends down just enough to get his hand on his face, the hold looks tight and possessive as he raises the vocalist’s face and forces him to look straight in his eyes. The gaze they share oozes every sort of tension. Kyungsoo suddenly has to clear his throat, it must be the almost choking and the coughing’s fault and nothing else. Surely.  </p><p>The guitar solo should almost be over, but in this rendition of the song it keeps going, giving enough time to the guitarist, who's not playing, to smear dark lipstick over the singer’s lips. Kyungsoo thinks it must be a plum red, a tribute to the iconic music video, but the lights don’t let him know for sure. Whatever color it is, it makes Yixing look even more gorgeous and Kyungsoo feel even more ashamed of how easily his thoughts turn R rated when Yixing's involved. The way Yixing moans into the mic after Ronghao shoves him away is treacherous, sinful. Yixing falls limp against the floor and stays there, singing the rest of the song while crawling on all fours, from time to time reaching into the small crowd in front of him, grabbing anyone he can get and pushing his forehead against theirs, singing to them directly. His voice, his eyes spell out nothing but sex and Kyungsoo knows exactly what it feels like to be so close to him when he's in that particular mood, he can feel it on his skin, even with Yixing performing meters away from him. He turns away for the rest of the song, refusing to let his dumb, horny brain make him half hard in his stockings.</p><p>“That was <em> amazing</em>!” Baekhyun is finally sitting again, he tries to look calm, but his hands keep fidgeting with the flounces of his skirt and his eyes dart nervously in Kyungsoo’s direction. </p><p>Kyungsoo ignores it and laughs at what Junmyeon is saying, even if he's not exactly sure what it is. There’s nothing to see here, he’s behaving completely normally and he still absolutely loathes animal prints, especially if paired up with latex.</p><p>“I have something to share too!” Baekhyun’s sudden announcement has Minseok groaning, Kyungsoo wants to thank him, a kindred spirit in the midst of all this madness.</p><p>“What?” Unsurprisingly, Jongdae sounds interested and eggs him on.</p><p>“See, Kyungsoo and I have made a bet-”</p><p>“No, we have not.” He’s quick to deny, but Baekhyun glosses over him easily</p><p>“If him and Yixing become official by the end of the year, he’ll be obliged to let me wear his most expensive dress every time I ask for it.” the group erupts in an overly dramatic gasp.</p><p>“...And you agreed?” Minseok looks at Kyungsoo skeptically.</p><p>“Of course not.” Kyungsoo sighs not enjoying in the slightest Minseok's subtle way of saying ‘<em>you agreed even though you’re going to lose?’ </em>, “Not that I would lose, but I’d rather go out with a client from the café, than leaving my dress in his hands.” Everyone grimaces, the thought has even Kyungsoo himself pull a face almost regretting having said it.</p><p>The clientele of the café isn't exactly of the highest quality and Kyungsoo isn’t particularly keen on spending time thinking about what that kind of people do out of the café with him in mind. Because he<em> knows </em>what they do, sometimes they have to do it so bad that they can’t even wait to be outside and end up leaving the results of their enthusiastic feelings for the servers in the bathroom stalls.</p><p>“But wait, what does Kyungsoo get if it doesn’t happen?” Jongdae questions and Kyungsoo’s interest is completely swayed, he glances at Baekhyun expectantly.</p><p>“...I haven’t thought about it.” Baekhyun scratches his chin</p><p>“I want your fake Angelic Pretty Twinkle Star bag.” Not an ounce of uncertainty.</p><p>“Why? You never wear sweet lolita…” Baekhyun’s voice trembles slightly, probably already knowing where this is heading.</p><p>“I want to cut it up and burn it in front of you.” Kyungsoo feels a rush of power just by imagining it, Baekhyun’s jaw falls almost to the ground “The way that thing is sewn up is a crime against Angelic Pretty’s entire brand and craftsmanship.” </p><p>“Isn’t that going too far?” Junmyeon chimes in, looking concerned.</p><p>“No, no. It’s fine, I’m in.” Baekhyun extends his hand and offers it to Kyungsoo “I'm not scared, I know it’s gonna be an easy win.” When Kyungsoo takes his hand and shakes it vigorously, Jongdae cheers from the side </p><p>“You’re going to lose, idiot.” Kyungsoo challenges him with a squint of his eyes, his long eyelash extensions barely let him see Baekhyun’s face, but he considers that a good thing.</p><p>“No, <em> you’re </em> going to lose.” Kyungsoo doesn’t like the confidence in his voice as he speaks and raises his chin to point at something behind his challenger. Kyungsoo understands that turning to look will probably reveal itself to be a trap, but he does it anyway. Of course, he was not ready to find Yixing dancing to the song being performed by the new band on the stage and even less to see him sandwiched between two people, his snake print shirt discarded on the floor, his arms resting on the shoulders of the girl in front of him and his head posed on Yifan's chest, one of his guitarists, who's standing behind him and holding him by his waist. He’s biting his lip and his hips move smoothly, every motion making the defined muscles of his torso twitch and his sweaty skin glisten. </p><p>It’s terribly impolite to stare and yet Kyungsoo finds himself doing it once more, for all the reasons listed above and also the suspicion that he might be seeing piercings on Yixing’s small, hardened nipples.</p><p>“Well, this was interesting for exactly one second,” Jongdae huffs “Everyone knows who’s winning now. Prepare the dress, ‘Soo”</p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t respond, but the way he quickly turns away from the scene, like was caught red handed, speaks for itself. </p><p>Fortunately for everyone, Junmyeon steers the conversation to entirely different grounds, having a lot to say about his job hunting adventures. It’s certainly an experience hearing someone dressed like a 300 year old vampire share his disappointing encounters with lawyers and their offices. </p><p>Drinks continue to be ordered and brought to their table, Kyungsoo’s glass never seems to become empty and by the time his eyes stumble upon a clock, it’s almost four in the morning. He stands up, it’s difficult to operate on his platform boots after drinking so much, but his will is stronger than the speed with which the room around him is spinning.</p><p>“Where ‘re you goin’?” Baekhyun’s words are all slurred, he laughs after he’s spoken, probably amused by how drunk he sounds.</p><p>“Restroom.” Kyungsoo gets out curtly, his head starts hurting out of nowhere, more pressure is added to the already tight grip that his wig has on his temples. He feels like laughing at Baekhyun, but the muscles in his face feel so relaxed that he can’t even be bothered to disturb them to do that much.</p><p>The doors to the restroom look like they were directly stolen from a saloon, ugly and the furthest thing from functional, Kyungsoo has seen more than once people get hit straight in the chest by the flappy wood. Something among those last words registers weirdly in Kyungsoo’s head, but he decides not to think about it.</p><p>Nothing hits Kyungsoo, but he does walk into two people in crop tops doing coke off the gross surface around the washbasins. He’s a bit concerned when they raise their eyes and start staring at him when the stupid doors swing closed behind his back, they follow all his movements in silence, until he’s closed into a stall, out of their range. It smells like death in there, so much that the urge to vomit almost overpowers the pained call of his bladder.</p><p>Pushing down his stockings is a bit of challenge, he feels gross and sweaty everywhere from his waist down; his flimsy attention is stolen by the black frills on the sides of his underwear and the deep, red imprints they've left on the skin of his thighs. After he’s done being angry at his stockings, it takes barely a few seconds to go through with what he actually came to do. </p><p>In the short walk to the sink he notices that the two people that were there before have disappeared and have left one single person in their stead. With the new person has also come a new smell: the distinct odor of cigarette smoke is added directly into the nauseating concoction that has substituted all the breathable air in the room. The person is smoking inside a shared and closed space like it’s not one of the dumbest, most annoying things someone can do; maybe the saloon doors are there because crossing that threshold is like venturing in the wild west. Kyungsoo ignores it, even though he’s pissed off that his velvet dress is going to be soaked in the stench of cigarette smoke. He takes a breath, trying to calm his racing mind, but he almost gags instead and then decides to act like he hasn’t seen anything, wanting nothing more than just get out of there and go back home. The drunkenness is wearing off and he’s not having fun anymore.</p><p>He can tell that the stranger has been looking at him this entire time, so he’s not particularly surprised when he raises his head and he meets their eyes, although what does surprise him is who those eyes belong to.</p><p>“Still upset about my pants?” Yixing asks before taking one more drag off his cigarette,</p><p>“I didn’t care enough to be upset about them.” Kyungsoo glances at his naked chest just once, making sure those really are piercings. <em> They are</em>. He wonders when did he get them done, he doesn't remember Yixing ever mentioning anything about it.</p><p>“I didn't tell you, because you get so prissy about my clothes, I didn't know if you would have been ok with piercings..." Yixing looks briefly at his reflection in the mirror hanging above the sinks "To be honest, I had decided to ask you about it the other day after class, but you didn't let me." He crosses his arms, the position makes his pecs raise and squish together, Kyungsoo catches himself staring at his cleavage like the old sleazebags that try to grope him at the café "I'm glad you didn't get the chance to talk me out of it, though.” Yixing looks down and pokes one of his own nipples lightly. Kyungsoo would have never tarnished his reputation with the crime of talking Yixing out of doing something as hot as that.</p><p>Kyungsoo's horniness stops abruptly when he realizes what Yixing has been saying and raises his eyes up to his face to look at him weirdly. It takes an embarrassingly long amount of time for him realize that he hasn’t just thought his previous questions, but has voiced them as well and Yixing was just answering him.</p><p>“Is that why you’ve been staring so much all night?” Yixing pushes himself off the wall and rubs the lit end of the cigarette on the faux marble top framing the basins “You could have come dance with me, instead of staring.” the sound of his atrocious white, high heeled boots hitting the floor seems to echo in Kyungsoo’s ears, even over the Dir En Grey cover band performing a few meters from them. </p><p>Yixing moves closer to him, Kyungsoo’s slightly taller than him tonight, his heels are higher, and from the vantage point he’s unable to miss the gentle slope of Yixing's nose, the loose glitter all over his skin and the way it picks up the cold light coming from the restroom ceiling. He feels the invitation coming from the way Yixing stretches the smooth expanse of his neck, Kyungsoo's gaze halts on the hint of stubble on his chin and then plum lipstick over his swollen lips, standing out in the midst of his soft features; more that half of it is gone, probably smeared on someone else’s lips, but there’s still enough to steal attention and make his pretty lips look like a ripe fruit. Kyungsoo finds it hard to resist wanting to have a taste.</p><p>The distance between their faces is cut short by Yixing, his eyelids close, thin eyelashes brush against his skin; his lips part, skimming millimeters away from Kyungsoo’s black lipstick, he sighs and lets his hands caress lightly the fabric of Kyungsoo's skirt, his eyes open again and he looks down, Kyungsoo sees his gaze move over his figure. Although he doesn't find the patience to indulge his curiosity, deciding on a whim to pose his gloved hand on the right side of Yixing's neck and push his face up by maneuvering the hold on his jaw; once they're finally looking at each other he dips down and kisses him softly. The small, wet sounds of their lips meeting make Kyungsoo shudder and his chest suddenly feel hollow, his free fingertips tingle with the need to touch and they easily find a spot on Yixing's naked chest. Yixing's breath stinks of alcohol and of what he was smoking, but Kyungsoo is far from being turned off by it. He’s shocked stiff by just how attractive another human being can be.</p><p>Kyungsoo erases the distance left between their bodies easily, his hand moves on its own to grip the flesh of Yixing's left pec and playfully tweak his dusky nipple. He tilts his head, ready to further their short pecks into deeper kissing, but Yixing pulls away before he can go through with it. </p><p>“I was smoking, doesn't it gross you out?” he asks and poses one of his cold hands, on the fingers that Kyungsoo is keeping secured around the metal in his left nipple. </p><p>“Uh?” Kyungsoo questions back with a mindless sound, once again it takes a couple of seconds to get his drunk brain up to speed “Ehm… Yeah, right.” he responds, agreeing with Yixing, but also damning him for interrupting him when he was so close to achieving the only thing his dazed thoughts can focus of.</p><p>“I’m glad you like them though... I'll let you play with them on Wednesday, okay?” Yixing smiles brightly, Kyungsoo thinks he goes blind for a few seconds, but then regains his sight as the kiss that Yixing poses on his lips produces a loud smacking sound. His cold hands raise to pose on the sides of Kyungsoo’s neck, the temperature makes him shiver “And you’re too drunk to still be here, go back home, okay?” If he keeps ending all his sentences with gentle, cute <em> okay</em>s Kyungsoo is going to end up agreeing to everything he says.</p><p>Yixing smiles, he’s so beautiful, even under this hospital-like lighting and with the stench enveloping the whole room, Kyungsoo closes his eyes and his hand travels down, finding the curve of Yixing’s thin waist. He thinks useless, alcohol induced thoughts as his lips find a patch of skin on Yixing’s neck inviting enough to latch onto and brands a small, reddish mark on it. </p><p>Then, suddenly, just as quick as he’s appeared, Yixing is gone, slipped out of his fingers with a loud goodbye kiss and a heartless, albeit still dazzling, smile.</p><p>Kyungsoo’s disappointment is downright shameful, he’s a few hours into a bet with his most prized dress at stake and he’s already almost ruined his chances of victory with his own hands like a dumbass. Like the lonely, horny dumbass that he is.</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>very late, very sorry. last part will be up tomorrow or the day after tomorrow.</p>
<p>songs in this chapter:<br/>Illuminati: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VYlobUsKAU (WARNING! flashing lights, blood, kinda gorey and other explicit stuff)<br/>Aegen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mNN3Qg5RkM</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“What happened on Friday? Why did you disappear without saying anything?” Baekhyun runs into the café, the volume of his voice is deafening in the silence of the almost empty store. He’s dressed in baggy, neon yellow cargo pants and his hot pink sunglasses cover up half of his face.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo jolts, almost drops the tray in his hands “I went home. I was tired.” he looks away and walks to the table where he has to deliver two lemon syrup cake slices, leaving Baekhyun behind. He sputters and whisper-shouts his name, trying to get his attention again, but Kyungsoo doesn’t give in.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You look lovely today too, Kyungsoo.” one of his regulars, a nice, scrawny man compliments him, when Kyungsoo leaves the plate in front of him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ew, don’t talk to me.” Kyungsoo feels bad treating him in the way he does, even though it’s clear that the man is never offended by his words, on the contrary he seems to await eagerly each of Kyungsoo’s rude remarks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His eyes always linger just a breath too long over Kyungsoo’s masterfully exaggerated disgusted expressions, he bows deeply every time he is unjustly scolded, barely keeping the corners of his lips from tilting upwards in a </span>
  <em>
    <span>smile</span>
  </em>
  <span>, of all things. He keeps his head down whenever Kyungsoo looks at him and his fingers seem frightened to touch Kyungsoo’s gloved palms, as he hands him his generous tips. Although, when he does muster the courage to look at Kyungsoo, his eyes become shameless and direct, charged with silent words that Kyungsoo hopes he’ll never have to hear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s always been nothing but polite, he’s always made sure Kyungsoo didn’t feel uncomfortable with him; Kyungsoo himself has had to reassure him more than once, telling him that a hungry glance is nothing when you’ve had clients try to get their hands under your skirt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Honestly Kyungsoo doesn’t really mind him at all, he knew that being ogled was part of the job since he applied for it and this guy is one of the most polite kinky fucks that visit the place, he just seems like a mostly normal man that needs a safe place where a crossdresser can call him a failure and Kyungsoo thinks that’s kind of brave in a way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s not sure he’d find the courage to walk into a place like this if he were in the guy’s shoes. Well, there is to say that lately he hasn’t really had the courage to do anything other than stay at home, watch movies and get drunk on Wednesday and Friday nights.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By the time he’s back at Baekhyun’s side, he’s bouncing on his feet, talking excitedly with Chanyeol. The last time he saw the latter, he told him he was going to change out of the uniform, but the only things he has discarded are the white apron and his short, green wig.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo walks past them, the only words he catches from the excited exchange are Pokémon and bad textures. He has to fill the dishwasher, so he ignores them and gets on with his work, even though he does have a bone to pick with Nintendo as well.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wait, wait, wait!” Baekhyun raises a hand directly in front of Chanyeol’s face and like a well trained Golden Retriever the taller stops everything that he was doing, Kyungsoo’s eyebrows furrow when Baekhyun turns to him “So, this means I can borrow the dress now, right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? How did you get to that conclusion?” he asks, still bothered by the fact that Baekhyun won’t let this stupid thing go.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on… I’ve known you for years Kyungsoo,” he pulls a face, making it look like between the two of them it’s Kyungsoo the one pulling words out of his ass “I know what you mean... ‘I was </span>
  <em>
    <span>tired</span>
  </em>
  <span>’.” he makes quotation marks with his fingers making the fringes of beads sewn along the sleeves of his black cropped sweater hit against each other. They create a sound that takes Baekhyun’s usual annoying level to positively insufferable.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, you clearly don’t.” Kyungsoo reaches forward to take some of the fringes in his hands, the quality is not too bad, it would look cute, if it weren’t so noisy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What is going on?” Chanyeol asks curiously, his chin perched on top of Baekhyun’s head, right between his long, blonde pigtails</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I made sure that Kyungsoo’s boyfriend would visit him at the Exoplanet’s bathrooms... And next thing I knew Kyungsoo and the guy had both disappeared!” Baekhyun gasps at his own words and covers his mouth, Kyungsoo can’t stand to see someone so annoying wrapped up in such a pretty sweater.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh la la!” Chanyeol’s eyebrows raise on his forehead high enough to hide completely behind his fiery red bangs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo groans, even though he has to admit he’s impressed that Baekhyun could further his schemes even with all that alcohol inebriating him, especially considering that Kyungsoo’s own drunken brain had just thrown him into a bottomless downwards spiral “He only went to the bathroom to smoke.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“...That sounds kind of hot.” Chanyeol contributes with what Kyungsoo sees as the worst take about the entire situation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right?!” Baekhyun agrees with Chanyeol, of course.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Does lung cancer really sound that hot to you?” Kyungsoo shakes his head and continues working on the dishwasher.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not our fault, Hollywood and the tobacco lobby brainwashed us to think that people look hotter with a cigarette in hand.” Baekhyun finally moves the glasses off his face, like his next words needed to be told in complete seriousness “The truth is that you’ve found yourself a real hottie, his charm stats are maxed out with or without nicotine addiction and yet you’re too much of a coward to ask him out properly.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, do I know him?” Chanyeol asks, Kyungsoo immediately turns to look at Baekhyun, ready to tell him to shut his mouth if he wants to live, but he is interrupted by the last two lunchtime clients moving closer to the register. Kyungsoo’s attention turns towards them, giving only one last glance at Baekhyun’s grin, worried that he will overshare with Chanyeol. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s not anxious about letting a friend know about his </span>
  <em>
    <span>incredibly free</span>
  </em>
  <span>, </span>
  <em>
    <span>unlabeled</span>
  </em>
  <span> relationship with the most talented and most handsome musician in the jrock cover bands scene, but Chanyeol is Yixing’s friend as well. If Chanyeol doesn’t know, it means that Yixing doesn’t want him to know and it’s definitely not Baekhyun’s place to gossip about it behind his back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To be honest, if Kyungsoo had a choice, he wouldn’t want his friends to know about it either, it would have saved him from all the uncomfortable conversations and the teasing; but unfortunately, when it comes to these sort of things, Baekhyun is the one deciding how much of Kyungsoo’s private matters will stay private. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s forty-seven thousand won, pay and fuck off, I’m tired of looking at you.” Kyungsoo repeats his usual shtick, his regular’s hand trembles a bit when he leaves the money on the counter, Kyungsoo grabs it without looking at him and prepares his change</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, keep it.” the man adjusts his tie as he says it, a bit embarrassed, but he quickly gathers his wits when Kyungsoo has to change his character and act like a normal waiter, following the shop rules to see off the clients, </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you so much, sir.” he smiles at him and it’s funny how turned off he looks, but these are the rules and if he wants to get Kyungsoo’s insults he has to get his customary polite send off as well. Kyungsoo accompanies them to the door and then bows, waits to hear the doors close before straightening up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re going out with Yixing?!” Chanyeol screams at the tops of his lungs. Kyungsoo looks at the soft, pale blue ceiling above him and sighs, utterly defeated.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>⚜</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before he can realize it, an entire week has flown by, densely packed with classes and work, and Kyungsoo is standing under the rain, once again staring at the pink neon sign of Exoplanet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s nervous. He ended up skipping his usual Wednesday visit and also most of his classes with Yixing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Not because Kyungsoo is avoiding him, no matter how much his friends say he is, but because he is feeling a bit unsure, he doesn’t know what to expect from Yixing now that people around him have learned about </span>
  <em>
    <span>them</span>
  </em>
  <span> from someone else. He could imagine Yixing being mad at him and Baekhyun, if Kyungsoo were in his shoes he probably would be. Even though, it’s also true that Kyungsoo is naturally less adaptable to surprise changes than Yixing. More than once he’s seen Yixing shrug off without a single thought things that would have infuriated him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The doubt is there though and Kyungsoo feels like if he were to share what he feels with Yixing, it would lay on their relationship an emotional weight that should not be there. So, for today, Kyungsoo will allow himself to care a bit less, act as if nothing happened and see where Yixing will decide to take things. If he has become uncomfortable with him then so be it, Kyungsoo only needs to hear him say the word and everything will be over.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A bitter, sharp needle stabs itself somewhere down Kyungsoo’s throat. He shakes his head and ignores the direct signals delivered by his subconscious.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo pulls his short cape tighter against himself, the fuzzy collar covers his chin and tickles him as his breath makes it flutter around. Today he’s wearing all black, completely set on flying under the radar, hoping to be ignored by everyone and to not attract any unnecessary attention. All he wants to do is to give his brain some rest and chat with his friends.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s kind of ironic, the way all his good intentions completely crumble into dust, the moment he walks in.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He’s here! This next song was requested for Kyungsoo!” Kyungsoo lives the scene in slow motion. The voice coming from the stage, the way the entire club turns towards the entrance and everyone’s eyes settle on the space he’s occupying; their eyes burying holes directly on his form. Kyungsoo’s ears ring, making it seem like the entire club goes completely silent for long seconds and then, suddenly, there’s loud cheering, flashing lights and a synth playing a melody that provokes a visceral kind reaction in Kyungsoo. It’s Malice Mizer’s Illuminati and he’s not sure why, but someone is making Yixing perform it for him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Memories of watching the music video on repeat, scandalized and curious all at the same time. He couldn’t see much through the 144p quality, but every single one of those gratuitously shocking images have engraved themselves in Kyungsoo’s mind and, without any doubt, made him who he is today. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fishnets, leather, latex, naked women, whips, blood, Mana in a blond wig and disorienting, flashing lights.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s nape feels prickly, a symptom of the overwhelming embarrassment he’s been unwillingly thrown into. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His ears, his face, his entire being are red and burning by the time Yixing starts to sing. From the corner of his eye he sees two people walk towards him, he recognises Baekhyun and Jongdae easily. Even in the darkness of the club, he can see Baekhyun’s proud grin, making it way too easy to understand who should be blamed for the years worth of embarrassment Kyungsoo has experienced in the last few minutes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If it weren’t for Jongdae dragging him to their table, who knows how long it would have taken for him to get away from the wall where he was attached to.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That… Was crazy.” If that was </span>
  <em>
    <span>crazy</span>
  </em>
  <span> for Baekhyun’s standards, then it was completely </span>
  <em>
    <span>unthinkable</span>
  </em>
  <span> for Kyungsoo’s, heart-attack worthy. Sort of the same feeling he’s had the first time he saw the Illuminati music video, but also scaringly close to how he felt the first time Yixing pulled down his pants and asked him to fuck him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Baekhyun and Junmyeon seat Kyungsoo on the couch, Minseok is looking at him with eyes that ooze disappointment and Kyungsoo feels guilty, having let down his roommate and spiritual brother in such an embarrassing, theatrical way. The rest of his friends are laughing at him, he looks at them but their faces don’t really register in his head, all he sees is how amused they are by his misery. He copes by acting like none of them are there and by staring off in the distance; which quickly turns into blankly watching the stage and feeling his life force leave him little by little.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is decked out in full Illuminati paraphernalia and </span>
  <em>
    <span>of course</span>
  </em>
  <span> he would be wearing Gackt’s outfit out of all the members; of course he would choose, the most controversial gremlin of japanese entertainment and look just as fucking hot as him. In latex from head to toe, taunting Kyungsoo and his double standards. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His shorts are an accurate reproduction of Gackt’s, they’re high waisted and too short to be decent, tucked inside them there’s a corset, tightening his waist into a shape that has Kyungsoo sweating; his chest is covered by the most nineties looking short jacket with the addition of useless fishnet sleeves. More of the flimsy fishnet material hugs his thighs, the only parts of his legs that aren’t covered by the high boots he’s wearing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo, worshipper of everything that is orderly and tastefully frilly, is seeing what is his most secret, shameful, sexual fantasy incarnated right in front of his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The way Yixing keeps smiling and biting his black lips is artfully designed to mock Kyungsoo and what’s left of his sanity, barely still hanging on. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The shiny, black material of his clothes moves stiffly over his lean body: the high waisted hotpants bite into his fleshy thighs when he squats down and gets on his knees, mimicking what Kyungsoo has seen his favourite artists do in recordings of old concerts. The short jacket rides up his torso, showing the point where the corset ends and meets his chest, moving just high enough to have Kyungsoo lick his dried up lips and imagine the sight of his nicely accessorized nipples.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo is hard in his satin underwear. He feels feral, like his human brain isn’t able to connect properly with the rest of his being, he guesses it must be because his blood is being employed to sustain just one of his organs, the one that cannot think to save its life.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is laying on the floor, his platform boots kick in the air until Aarif, the bass player, grips his calf and drags the singer to the edge of the stage, Yixing splays himself open to all the shameless hands reaching for him. He turns on his belly and looks straight at Kyungsoo, while he sings the raspy whispers of the bridge. He grasps someone’s hand and pulls it to his face, his lips part and his tongues peeks out, licks the length of the fingers in his grasp, someone else extends their hands and touches Yixing’s legs, they lay a firm hold on the inside of his thigh.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo bites the inside of his cheek, torn between wanting to look away and needing to keep looking, to let his eyes roam over Yixing’s lascivious poses as he belts out the most demanding part of the song. Just a moment before the song enters the last chorus, his gloved index finger points in Kyungsoo’s direction and then moves towards the bathroom.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The witch is dead! Kyungsoo has been defeated! Moi-même-Moitié here I come!” Baekhyun stands up and puts one of his red platform shoes on the table once Yixing’s last obscene moan closes the song, he raises a fist in the air, looking onto the horizon. A victorious pose, with no doubt; Kyungsoo thinks as, for the first time that night, he looks at Baekhyun and actually sees him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I hated that.” he says and all his friends grow quiet, “It made me horny.” everyone laughs at Kyungsoo’s deadpan delivery, “And you haven’t won yet,” he stands up and stares dead into Baekhyun’s eyes, “Just because I’m fucking him tonight, it doesn’t mean he’s my boyfriend.” He takes the thick, short wool cape off his shoulders, folds it and leaves it on Minseok’s lap, the only one he trusts to keep his belongings intact.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His words raise a chaotic choir of responses, all repeating a variation of “</span>
  <em>
    <span>That’s bullshit</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. Kyungsoo does not pay them any mind as he rushes past the tables and pushes his way through the saloon doors. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The bathroom is crowded, all kinds of people piled into the small space and more trail behind Kyungsoo. Everyone is just standing around, doing nothing, even though the two functioning stalls are free. Kyungsoo’s forehead creases, his impetus gradually dying down, does this mean they’re here for his same reason? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Can just one small gesture from Yixing have this crowd gather up? The notion throws Kyungsoo through a whirl of uncomfortable emotions and even more doubts. It’s not really his business if Yixing has other people other than him, but it’s hard to ignore the twinge of </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> rising from the middle of his chest again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Since this bet business has started, his ability to act without thinking has drastically lessened. He’s always been aware about his mind going off the rails when Yixing’s involved, but it used to be a lot easier to label it as simple, non committal attraction. He probably just needs to take a break from all of it and from Yixing especially.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo is pulled out of his thoughts and thrown back into maddening lust as Yixing, in all his disgustingly glorious beauty, waltzes through the doors and picks Kyungsoo from the back of his dress, making him look like a cat being moved around by its nape, and drags him into one of the stalls. Some of the people in the room greet Yixing, Kyungsoo sees all their eyes coming alive in a sad domino effect as he walks past them. He feels like he’s just experienced a scene out of a cult where Yixing is worshipped like a god. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once they’re in the privacy offered by the flimsy walls of one of the stalls, surrounded by their neutral blue and horrible stench, Kyungsoo feels like he can focus again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t pull my clothes.” he quickly shoves the hand on the back of his dress away, Kyungsoo sees Yixing flinch, surprised by the sudden shift, but before Kyungsoo can add anything else, the other is back in his personal space, breathing his air. Tonight he’s the one standing a few centimeters taller than him and the way in which he is peering at Kyungsoo from above, tells him that he has every intention to use that height to his advantage.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry.” his hands settle on Kyungsoo’s shoulders, he feels his long fingers play with the frills and ruffles that he finds there “Needed to be quick.” Kyungsoo is cornered against one of the walls, under different circumstances he would be too disgusted to think about anything other than how gross and sticky the metal walls feel. Luckily, Yixing isn’t letting any free space to welcome thoughts that don’t have to do with him or with his fingers moving to stroke Kyungsoo’s neck or with his leg lodging between Kyungsoo’s. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I hope you can forgive me.” Yixing whispers, his dark lips enunciate the words slowly and his breath hits Kyungsoo’s across his own glossy, violet lips.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s eyes follow a drop of sweat leaving the damp ends of Yixing’s deep, black hair and rolls down his temples, hitting his high cheekbones, which shine brilliantly with specks of platinum glitter. His skin glows so beautifully even under lights as bad as those of the public restroom.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Everything he does, voluntarily or not, is so unnecessarily erotic.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing pulls his hair back, letting Kyungsoo see the purple shimmer blended on his eyelids. Kyungsoo isn’t sure if it’s because of that, or because he’s not drunk, or maybe because he’s forced to look up at him, but his eyes look more fierce than usual tonight. The sensation they instill in him is addictive, they order him not to look away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo has never felt sexual tension so strongly in his life. His entire body seems pulled by strings, every nerve-ending pulsing, sending signals to every inch of his skin, making it raise and pinch into goosebumps and shivers. His entire body is alight, working so vigorously and yet all he is able to add to the conversation is a croaky “...Sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck, your voice…” Not the kind of reaction Kyungsoo was expecting. Yixing’s chest is carefully plastered against his and his hands keep moving, one of them is grasping his shoulder, while the other plays distractedly with Kyungsoo’s dainty cross earrings “Did you like the surprise?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s head tilts and his shoulders relax, his body finally loosening and molding around the other’s “It was embarrassing.” he whispers right by his ear, his response is a low, quiet moan, that turns into a satisfied hum when Kyungsoo’s hands settle on his lower back, “I didn’t need to see you dressed like this.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lower,” Yixing demands, his arms have moved off Kyungsoo and are working on the zipper of his own jacket. They’re kept together by a strange, strong magnetic force, Yixing can barely pull down his zipper with so little space between them, but he doesn’t move away, instead he continues to close the distance, his cheek brushing against Kyungsoo’s synthetic, purple bangs. Kyungsoo follows the instructions, stopping the glide of his hands just above the swell of his ass. The latex is so tight against his body, the way the material is squeezing him makes Kyungsoo feel breathless, digging meanly into the soft flesh of Yixing’s toned muscles. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lower.” he repeats and Kyungsoo complies, his hands smoothing over the plastic-like fabric and squeezing, maybe a bit too roughly, enough to draw a yelp out of Yixing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I fucking hate latex.” Kyungsoo continues to whisper, it sounds more like he’s reminding himself he’s supposed to loathe the material, no matter how much the feeling of it slipping under his fingertips drives him insane.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t think I can’t feel how hard you are under your skirt.” Yixing smiles satisfied, Kyungsoo stares at his cheek creasing and his deep dimple digging in the flesh of his cheek; without thinking he cuts the distance and kisses it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s not the latex’s fault, but of who’s wearing it.” Kyungsoo gets out, feeling ashamed. Yixing moans, the combination of Kyungsoo’s deep voice whispering in his ears and his hands on his ass making him shudder. Kyungsoo kisses him again, but this time he doesn’t stop at his lips, leaving a trail down his long neck and then, once he reaches it, he bites down on his right collarbone, pulling a loud, heavy sigh out of him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The jacket is open and Kyungsoo doesn’t even think twice before diving in. His nipples are so small, cute, perfectly bite-sized, he’s always made sure to give them special attention, but now he wouldn’t be able to ignore them even if he wanted to. The metal passing through them forces him to stare and stop breathing, then finally lower his face and take one of them in his lips. The metal piercing the hardened flesh feels colder than expected on Kyungsoo’s tongue, one more sensation adding to the mixture stirring under his skin, setting him on fire from the inside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve been lonely,” Yixing begins, Kyungsoo hums as he sucks harshly, his tongue playing with the pinkish flesh “I thought I said we were going to play on Wednesday… But you didn’t even show up.” His hands rest on the back of Kyungsoo’s head while he switches side to lay wet kisses on the other nipple “I started thinking you wanted to corner me at university, but I haven’t seen you all week…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo straightens, he looks up at Yixing, his plump lips are jutted out and his eyebrows furrowed. Kyungsoo’s hands find a perfect resting place on Yixing’s sides, settling easily in the curve created by the tight corset. “Sorry, I’ve been busy.” he gets out, as his hands continue to wander.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By touch alone, Kyungsoo can tell that Yixing’s corset is pulled tighter than how he usually ties it for him, he wonders who’s done it for him tonight, what was Yixing’s expression while it was being tightened, if he preferred this to when Kyungsoo does it for him. His hands move to Yixing’s back, feeling the tension on the laces, he pinches one out of curiosity and pulls it up, Yixing gasps and then wheezes as he grasps Kyungsoo’s shoulders, </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That knocked the air out of my lungs.” he laughs, Kyungsoo smiles as well, that’s the only response he can offer with the rest of his thinking power being occupied with useless, confusing wondering and internal screaming about how turned on he is.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s tug on his corset, forces Yixing to take a step back. Kyungsoo exploits the momentary loss of balance to push him to the other side of the stall, pinning him to the wall and effectively exchanging their positions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t believe it when Baekhyun said that Illuminati’s your favorite song, but i guess i was wrong...” Yixing laughs, such a cute sound, everything he does is so unbearable.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m offended that you would believe Baekhyun’s opinion on which song’s my favorite,” Might not be his favorite, but it is the undiscussed queen of his guilty pleasures “But I’ll let it go, because you’re pretty.” Yixing smiles and breathes deeply, then he freezes like he’s suddenly thinking about something, until, in a flash, his hands move to hold Kyungsoo’s head and pull him towards himself. The loose curls of his wig are forced messily against the sides of his head, but he forgets about it once Yixing’s lips are on his. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They have to stop kissing more than once to breathe, both of them too high-strung to remember how to do it while their lips slide against each other. Kyungsoo is able to breathe in efficiently only after he forces himself to focus to lick into Yixing’s mouth, adjusting the angle and sighing out in utter bliss. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re the prettiest.” Yixing echoes moments later, between kisses and with his naked chest heaving from the lack of air and shining with the remnants of Kyungsoo’s lip gloss and spit “Your hair, your dresses, your voice everything about you is so pretty. You’re so beautiful.” He gets out the words in a single string, letting the kisses he leaves on Kyungsoo’s chin and down his neck fill in the pauses. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing’s hands roam over Kyungsoo’s flat chest, they travel to his waist as he moves quickly to get on his knees. He looks up at Kyungsoo with eyes and a smirk that ooze mischief, his hands are on Kyungsoo’s legs now, he looks away to bend down and Kyungsoo mourns the loss of the sight of his handsome face, until he’s startled by a loud kissing sound and the ghost of a touch against his left knee.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The kisses continue to land all over his thighs and a few travel down to his calves, but soon enough Yixing finds something different to busy himself with. The only warning Kyungsoo gets is the appearance of the outline of Yixing’s head from under his skirt. For a moment he’s concerned about his well being, he’s not sure if he’ll be able to breathe normally under four layers of crinoline.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He quickly realizes his worries are wasted on Yixing, after hearing a loud ripping noise. Air hits his crotch, the sweat between his thighs starts turning cold. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Disgraceful</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Kyungsoo groans, displeased and criminally turned on. He can feel Yixing’s fingers pry the hole in his tights to widen it and then move to grope his ass as his warm mouth lays insistent touches over the length of his hard cock.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“...Your underwear is so soft.” His voice comes out muffled from under Kyungsoo’s skirt. Kyungsoo poses his hands over his head from above the layers of fabric, a silent request to get things moving; he’s terrified by the prospect of coming in his twenty-five thousand won panties just by listening to Yixing speak.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing starts going through the motions a lot faster after that, Kyungsoo feels the smooth fabric of his underwear being moved to the side, Yixing hums, low and filthy just as Kyungsoo feels his cock slip out of the last piece of clothing that had been containing it. Yixing leaves a kiss on Kyungsoo’s shaved scrotum, he lingers to suck the silky skin there, holding in his mouth one testicle at the time. Kyungsoo throws his head back and pulls his skirt up, wanting to touch Yixing more directly, but the best he can achieve are fistfuls of crinoline and just a few strands of dark, gelled hair.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He can feel Yixing’s soft, plump lips kiss up his length. The mental image of what he might look like right now is enough to shove Kyungsoo a step closer to orgasm, he closes his eyes and he can see it behind his eyelids, Yixing’s skin glistening with perspiration, his lips dragging over his skin and leaving dark, messy lipstick trails behind. Yixing makes a short, surprised hiccupy sound and then laughs lightly, Kyungsoo knows it’s because his dick has started kicking around, he can feel the jolts of arousal making his muscles cramp and twitch.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Your dresses… Are really cute, very elegant,” Kyungsoo snorts, that’s such a dumb thing to say, but the snarky remark stays at the tip of his tongue as Yixing speaks again and his hot breath hits the tip of Kyungsoo’s hard dick “Your underwear too, everything looks so pretty on you.” his voice is low and his delivery is lazy, slowed down by lust.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo decides to put in more effort and attempt to actually see what is hiding behind his skirt. After a bit of awkward juggling, he’s finally staring down at Yixing’s flushed face with no obstruction, the layers of the bottom of his dress bunched up against his chest. Yixing looks up at him, unabashed wanton look shining in his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Does it turn you on?” Kyungsoo asks, “Having your mouth fucked by a crossdresser?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, yes, yes.” Yixing moans, there is not a single gram of shame in his entire body. Kyungsoo grabs the top of his hair and pushes his face onto his crotch, he sees his dick drool precome over Yixing’s nose and left cheek, he’s still looking up at him, with just one eye and his mouth open, waiting eagerly “Only by you, no one else.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo clicks his tongue, he wants to believe it so bad.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He breathes in deeply, giving himself a moment, his right hand keeps a loose hold on his dick, he strokes himself lightly and slaps it across Yixing’s face. He keeps him waiting just a little longer and then pushes in, Yixing doesn’t waste any time to start sucking him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The sensation makes Kyungsoo pull on Yixing’s hair and his hips twitch, forcing his dick slightly further. Everything around him is so soft, warm and wet. Yixing’s mouth feels perfect around his cock.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck my throat, Kyungsoo. Use it.” Yixing says quickly in the short time span that he spends away from Kyungsoo’s erection. Kyungsoo, unable to say no, doesn’t let him repeat himself and starts thrusting forward. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo already feels his orgasm building after a few strokes, but to his defense, Yixing is doing all he can to pull it out of him. His hands, his tongue, his throat all work together to milk Kyungsoo dry. There’s spit falling in long strings from Yixing’s chin and his soft voice breaks into loud guttural moans stuck around the dick stuffed down his throat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s pace becomes faster and the pleasure increases, he hears his own groans echo in the restroom, his pace stutters and starts slowing down when he starts wondering if there might still be anyone outside listening to them, but Yixing takes charge and starts bobbing his head with an indignant sound, seemingly offended that Kyungsoo would dare to stop.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing grips Kyungsoo’s thighs when the latter announces that he’s about to come, making sure that all that he has to spill will end directly into his mouth. Kyungsoo’s face twists, his eyes blink and eventually close tightly, pressure builds in his throat, it presses so strongly against his vocal cords that he isn’t able to let out any sounds when he finally comes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing coughs and a light layer of sheen poses on his eyes, but he doesn’t pull off, he keeps sucking Kyungsoo’s dick until it has nothing left to give. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo breathes out loudly and poses his hands on the wall in front of him, anchoring himself back to Earth. Yixing’s face appears in front of his, he smiles minutely, looking pretty and innocent, his eyes bright and shiny, not the kind of face Kyungsoo would expect by someone who’s just started breathing again after deepthroating a cock.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo detaches one of his hands off the wall and uses his thumb to pry Yixing’s lips open, Yixing opens wide letting him check the inside of his mouth, all red and already cleaned of Kyungsoo’s come.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo dips forward and kisses him, the taste is strong, but he welcomes it. His hands circle Yixing’s waist again, taking a breather before letting his hands travel downwards with the intention of undoing the button and zipper of his shorts and finger him until his legs can’t hold him up anymore.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No,” Yixing continues kissing him, but Kyungsoo stops at his words “You can’t.” he moves his index finger from side to side in front of Kyungsoo’s nose.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But you didn’t come…” Kyungsoo’s still breathless, he feels like Yixing has swallowed all of his energy together with his come.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No time.” Yixing puts his hands on Kyungsoo’s and pecks his lips “I have to play with another band in a few.” He pushes his hands away, but he does so slowly, making sure Kyungsoo’s palms touch every millimeter of his hips and his waist, but he still smiles like he’s not doing anything fishy. The afterglow of his orgasm makes Yixing look even more handsome, it would be such a shame to let him go.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing still has his hands on Kyungsoo’s fingers, he intertwines them with his and tightens his hold for a moment. He’s looking at him expectantly, chewing his lower lip. He’s asking Kyungsoo to stop him, even if he knows he shouldn’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s so rare for diligent Yixing to try to bail out of his responsibilities, he never forgets a promise and always goes far and beyond to fulfill them. And yet, here he is, begging silently, guilty and needy all at once and Kyungsoo gives in without thinking. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How long is a few?” he asks, Yixing sighs out, his arms pose on Kyungsoo’s shoulders and he grasps his head pulling him closer</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Long enough…” he doesn’t specify for what, but Kyungsoo’s fingers are already pushing against his hole through his pants.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They move quickly after that, Kyungsoo’s experienced hands undo his pants in record time. In seconds, Yixing is leaning against the wall, his jacket opened completely and hanging off his shoulders and his pants slowly falling down his thighs, his lower half only covered by fishnets and the lower end of his corset.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No underwear?” Gross, Kyungsoo thinks, like his dick isn’t slowly kicking back to life just by thinking about it. Yixing’s dick is hard and lying awkward and heavy against the elastic web-like knit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nice and free,” Yixing laughs and bites the tip of his tongue, his own hands reach down to pull down his fishnets, knowing that Kyungsoo would never willingly rip a pair of perfectly intact tights.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s hands lay over Yixing’s and he uses the touch to make him turn and face the wall. He mouths against his neck, Yixing doesn’t particularly like it, but he lets it slide this time, probably because currently between the both of them, they don’t have enough brain power to think about anything useful. The only thing Kyungsoo’s internal voice is telling him to do is to get his fingers in Yixing’s ass and mark up his neck, make sure that when he does go back on the stage, the thirsty eyes looking at him will all </span>
  <em>
    <span>see</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing’s voice breaks in small, deep sounds, senseless and demanding; the kind of thing that he knows gets Kyungsoo going, even if he didn’t exactly need any additional encouragement.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo takes a few steps back and pulls apart Yixing’s tiny ass, there isn’t a lot of flesh to move around and what’s there is firm, but gives easily under Kyungsoo’s fingertips. Slightly curly hair frames his tight hole, Kyungsoo sees it twitch and widen lightly, shameless and inviting.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo would rather never spit on anything ever, but at the moment there’s nothing else he can do to help smooth the situation. So he gets a good hold on Yixing’s ass and holds it open, as he bends over.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, wait are you eating me out?” Yixing’s pitch is high and his tone hopeful, he widens his legs and arches his back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo almost gives in just because he looks like he’s never wanted anything more, but the priority now is to make Yixing come as soon as possible, before he has to rush back on the stage and Kyungsoo knows exactly how to do that with his fingers, his mouth not so much. As an apology of sorts, he dips in just for a moment, to peck his twitching hole and then spit on it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His fingers circle the rim carefully, he has to spit on it once more to make it wet enough and then gets back up, his mouth is back on Yixing’s nape, as two of his fingers slowly push their way inside him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not right now,” Kyungsoo sighs in Yixing’s right ear, “You’ll have to make do with my fingers.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve missed you.” Yixing reaches behind himself, ignoring Kyungsoo’s words, his hand lays softly on Kyungsoo’s cheek “Why have you been avoiding me?” his body shudders lightly as Kyungsoo’s whole fingers finally enter him, the fit is perfect, not as tight as Kyungsoo had expected.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo burrows against Yixing’s wide shoulder, he rests his forehead on the smooth fabric covering his skin and for a moment he thinks he shouldn’t answer, but then Yixing kisses his temple, it’s nice and natural, a bit too romantic for Kyungsoo’s weakened heart “I thought you would be angry at me,” he lets out, regretting it immediately “I told Baekhyun not to tell Chanyeol about…” he leaves the sentence unfinished, not knowing how to continue.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why would I be angry about that?” Yixing turns, his back hits the wall, he guides Kyungsoo’s hands around his hips, his right fingers immediately retaking their spot on his hole. Yixing’s arms circle Kyungsoo’s neck, he kisses him quickly, a fast trail of small pecks hit Kyungsoo’s lips and the area around them, he doesn’t dare imagine what kind of mess his lipstick is making.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So cute… Worrying so much for something like this, it’s not that serious… It doesn’t have to be serious.” Kyungsoo lets Yixing’s words sink in, he smiles tentatively, doesn’t let his disappointment come through his filters. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He knows their relationship isn’t serious, he knows, but now it’s starting to be glaringly obvious, that Baekhyun is right and that Kyungsoo has already passed the limits of his endurance concerning casual relationships.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah… You’re right.” </span>
  <span>He likes Yixing. He like him</span>
  <em>
    <span> like that</span>
  </em>
  <span>, even though Yixing doesn’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He steals another kiss from Yixing, in an attempt to rinse off the bitter taste on his tongue and then moves his index finger, the puffed up ridges of the rim of Yixing’s hole twitch under his touch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He shoves his two fingers back in and starts the pace, fast and unforgiving. Kyungsoo doesn’t think, he breathes in Yixing’s groans, lets his skin turn into goosebumps as it’s grazed by Yixing’s trembling limbs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is struggling to take in fresh air, he gasps and writhes as Kyungsoo’s fingers brush his prostate. “Wait,” he says, but he widens his legs and puts a tight grip around Kyungsoo’s wrist, holding him in place and pushing him up, deeper inside himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His thighs tremble violently, his knees threaten to give out and his voice breaks, while calling Kyungsoo’s name over and over.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo kisses his chin, his cheeks, etches more marks on the side of his neck. Yixing turns and looks right into his eyes, he’s almost crying, his lips are red and swollen, his black lipstick all kissed and bitten away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s gorgeous, damp with sweat and desperate, pleading Kyungsoo to make him come, but never reaching for his hard dick to get himself off, they’re a well coordinated duo and he knows Kyungsoo will take care of him. Kyungsoo hesitates, though, not wanting this to end too soon, but eventually he lowers the hand that he had been keeping on Yixing’s waist and takes hold of his hard member.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Only a few strokes and Yixing’s coming, his teeth push into his lower lip as white hits the door of the stall and the floor. Kyungsoo’s own cock is almost ready to go again, but he ignores it, distracted by Yixing holding him close and kissing him, pleased sighs and short praises are exchanged in the small space between them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re the best.” Yixing laughs airily, Kyungsoo smiles too, his eyes moving down, locking on the red imprints he has left on the side of Yixing’s neck.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yixing…” Yixing jolts in Kyungsoo’s arms, his name is coming from one of the stage microphones “Yixing, get out of the bathroom!” Yixing giggles, as the rest of the club erupts in a short burst of laughter.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s me…” he says, but doesn’t move, he keeps himself attached to Kyungsoo.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on. You have to go!” Kyungsoo laughs more heartily this time, but doesn’t move either, he does help Yixing pull up his pants, though.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yixing…” The person on stage draws out his name again and finally Kyungsoo and Yixing move away from each other. Yixing zips himself up and walks out, he blows a kiss at Kyungsoo as he pushes the door of the stall closed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo jolts as the door quickly opens again “What’s your favorite song then?” Yixing is asking, panicked as if his question had their life or death on the line.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s brain blanks out for entire seconds, one song comes to mind immediately, but it’s too embarrassing to say out loud, so he plays it off “Not telling.” He peeks his head out of the stall and kisses him for the last time, before shoving him away.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo stays inside the stall even after Yixing is gone, smiling to himself silently as the song on stage finally starts. His heart is going fast enough to make him fear that he’ll have a stroke.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is not good for him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>⚜</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Baekhyun is waiting for him out of the café, Kyungsoo feels his eyes burn holes on his skin through his purple sunglasses.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey,” he greets.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey.” Kyungsoo says back as he closes his lacy parasol. Baekhyun continues staring at him, chewing obnoxiously what Kyungsoo suspects being strawberry gum.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You have nothing else to tell me?” He walks towards him, his green, sixties style dress rides up his thighs with every step, showing the place where his ugly mustard thigh-highs end.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not really,” Baekhyun intertwines their arms and pulls him in the café, they still have some free time before their shift, but Kyungsoo doesn’t mind preparing a few minutes in advance and getting away from the cold bite of the late December weather.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Chanyeol came over and left something for you…” Baekhyun says, sounding suspicious, Kyungsoo grows curious as well, imagining what kind of thing might be waiting for him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nothing in particular catches his attention as they walk inside, there’s Jongin behind the counter working on a drink and Yuta walking around the tables. Kyungsoo is ready to move to the changing room and see if Chanyeol has left something for him there, but then his eyes travel over the pink tables and their easy glance turns into surprised staring, his eyebrows furrowing at the sight of a familiar white faux fur coat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Baekhyun giggles from his side and Kyungsoo realizes that the </span>
  <em>
    <span>thing</span>
  </em>
  <span> Chanyeol brought for him is Yixing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He walks through the café quickly, he bows his head at the few clients he walks past and then reaches Yixing’s table, turning on his high heels to face him. Yixing raises his eyes slowly once he realises someone is looking at him, his cheeks are puffed out, most likely filled with a few bites of one of the three slices of cake he has laying in front of him. They’re a slice of strawberry cake, a raspberry and chocolate tart and lemon syrup and meringue. They’re the sweetest desserts on their menu and are all served with small, animal cookies that Yixing has took off the slices and placed all together in one plate, the bunny, bear and cat all lined up perfectly one next to the other.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is so fucking cute, Kyungsoo feels like he could punch clean through a wall only using all the soft feelings he has for him boiling in his blood as fuel for his strength.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Kyungsoo!” If there’s something Kyungsoo truly hates, even more than bad fashion taste, is the sight and sounds of people eating with their mouth opened, yet Yixing does just that as he finally notices him and all Kyungsoo is busy doing is try to ignore the beats his heart is skipping.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hi…” he greets, quickly looking over the zebra low cut shirt he’s wearing and immediately closing his eyes, wanting to forget it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you free today?” Yixing has gulped down his mouthful of sugary sweets and is looking at him eagerly</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well… I have to work now-” Kyungsoo sits on the chair in front of him, </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, yes, I know, but what about after? I need to borrow you for something important!” Yixing interrupts him and continues talking while waving his little fork around,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you let me finish… I was saying I have work now but I’m free after that.” Kyungsoo squints, putting on a fake pissed off expression,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, sorry…” Yixing pulls back a bit, trying to hide inside his huge furry coat, he smiles sheepishly; but quickly picks himself back up “Do you know how to make bodysuits?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s head tilts to the side, moved by confusion “Ehm, maybe?” he says with little confidence, starting to see where the conversation is heading </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I need you to help me do one! Nothing too complicated, just a black one with long sleeves and a turtleneck.” He gestures widely with his hands, creating over his body the shape of the piece of clothing he’s envisioning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You want me to do that?” Kyungsoo intertwines his fingers, looking at Yixing’s excited miming a bit skeptically. He can’t promise he’ll be able to make it, he might know how to do it in theory, but practice is a whole other story.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’ll do it together… Just tell me what I have to buy and then come over at my apartment.” He reaches forward, his right hand pinching the blue fabric of Kyungsoo’s long sleeve.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo looks at him, trying to keep his expression vague. After his sad jealousy fit in the smelly Exoplanet bathroom, his brain has gone through a good amount of effort to stop thinking about Yixing and give some rest to itself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The options he has are two: one, to sort out his feelings by himself and not see Yixing for a while and not in that kind of half assed avoiding he’s been doing, which has achieved nothing other than make him think about Yixing even more than usual; two, confess and get it over with, but that kind of approach could put a definite end to all kinds of relationships between them, Kyungsoo already dies every time he sees him, he doesn’t even want to imagine what his reactions would be when he’ll have to brush shoulders with Yixing after getting rejected by him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Both options have their pros and cons and both will be equally as embarrassing to carry out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As it happens for most of Kyungsoo’s affairs, for better or for worse, Baekhyun barges in, snaps his fingers and makes decisions for him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course, he’s coming!” Baekhyun appears on their side, his hands slam on the table between them, startling them both.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uhm… I’ve never really done that kind of thing before,” Kyungsoo advances,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ve made me a pair of fancy trousers in a couple of hours, I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it.” Baekhyun waves his hand, dismissing him coldly, like making a bodysuit and making pants have anything in common “Asking him for help was definitely the right choice! His hands are magical!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh… I know that,” Yixing smiles, coquettish and tight lipped, clearly implying more than Baekhyun expected. He drops it after Baekhyun stares at him in exaggerated shock and returns to his cute, pleading eyes, directing them right at Kyungsoo “...Please?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo sputters, looks around himself, his gaze settling on Baekhyun, silently asking for one more suggestion, Baekhyun widens his eyes and nods enthusiastically. Kyungsoo remembers too late that there’s a competition between them and that they’re supposed to be on different teams, </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, I’ll write you a list.” he bites his tongue as Baekhyun claps his hands from his right,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know, Yixing, I love Moi-même-Moitié. Their dresses are especially good.” he’s not even looking at Yixing as he speaks, his eyes staring holes in Kyungsoo’s form as he stands up and does all he can to ignore his heartless bestfriend’s antics.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo turns suddenly, he tilts his head, pointing at the door to their right decorated with a bright red plaque reading </span>
  <em>
    <span>Staff Only.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing is already back to devoting his attention to the cake in front of him, not saying anything else as Kyungsoo and Baekhyun walk to the changing room.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This is getting too serious.” Kyungsoo drops the air of snarkiness that fuels most of the conversations with his best friend. He fidgets with the hem of his jacket, a small tremble accompanies the movements of his fingers.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wait… What is this about?” Baekhyun gently poses his hand on Kyungsoo’s shoulders, he plays nervously with the lace lining the seams, the row of small gems on top of his eyebrows shifts as his forehead creases with worry.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I guess you already know…” Kyungsoo looks at him with a grimace, his shoulders slump with the weight of his embarrassment “That I like…” He points his short, black nail at the door and, figuratively, at the person they’ve just left on the other side.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, yeah, of course.” Baekhyun nods and crowds Kyungsoo, his hand moves down his arm and takes his wrist, an encouraging touch while he waits for Kyungsoo to voice the rest of his thoughts.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo looks at him silently, not enjoying the tone of his response and the speed with which it was delivered; but despite that, he continues “I feel like I should…” he pauses, it’s hard gathering his thoughts, “Do something about this.” He’s not inexperienced with these kind of matters, but he’s also chronically shy and insecure and for someone like him, expecting the worst is always easier than hoping to achieve what he desires.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay, ‘Soo,” Baekhyun pushes carefully,  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know that he doesn’t...</span>
  <em>
    <span> Like</span>
  </em>
  <span> me.” His dark voice comes out in a feeble, little whisper, he immediately clenches his heavy, fake eyelashes shut, regret oozes from his features “That sounded so stupid.” He shakes his head and looks at the pavement, the studs of his platform mary janes catch his fleeting, ashamed attention.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re right.” Baekhyun tugs his arm, not leaving the grip on his wrist, on the other hand he keeps tightening it steadily as he speaks “It’s stupid that you would think that!” his voice lowers in volume all of a sudden, his free arm circles Kyungsoo’s shoulders “There’s no way he doesn’t like you. That’s the only reason I agreed on getting my beloved, fake Angelic Pretty bag bought on Wish involved with the bet.” Kyungsoo laughs at his satisfied expression.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Baekhyun always shines so brightly, has the face to say the worst, most embarrassing things without an ounce of shame, even now as Kyungsoo slowly feels himself wither with each of his complaints, Baekhyun is sincere and proud, facing everything with his chest puffed out. They’re alike under many aspects, but also so diametrically different. The way Baekhyun waltzes into things is light and free spirited; Kyungsoo is not like that, no matter how much he’s been trying to convince himself of the opposite, he’s not easy going, he’s a worrywart and a coward.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And Yixing. Yixing is so splendid. A star, not only for his talent, but his entire being, he just glows so beautifully in Kyungsoo’s eyes and he knows well that it’s not only the Exoplanet bathrooms lighting that makes him glow in such a way. His light is a steady stream of brilliance unrelated to his conditions, in his worst stage outfits or after an exam with his hair greasy and heavy bags under his eyes, he’s perfect and addicting and Kyungsoo’s chest seizes, his heart squeezed in the grip of his emotions as he admits it to himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what’s the plan?” Baekhyun scratches his chin, pulling Kyungsoo away from his unrelated, but much needed musings,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“...I don’t know, what do you think?” Kyungsoo grits his teeth as he speaks, already foreseeing his friend’s answer.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think you should confess.” He twirls and stands right in front of him, he grasps his shoulders “And I’m not just saying this because of the bet, I’m saying it because I know you’re thinking of going into hiding for a month and hope that you’ll forget the whole thing.” He knows him </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> well, maybe Kyungsoo should go into hiding to avoid Baekhyun. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Baekhyun squeezes the grip he has on his shoulders and shakes him strongy “It’s nerve-wracking, right?” he asks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo nods.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But we’ll get through it, right?” he keeps his gaze steady, pointing directly at Kyungsoo’s own itchy eyes, “Remember what happened when Sehun threw a drink on your black velvet dress and called you a boring asshole in front of the entire Exoplanet?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He’s not particularly happy to be reminded about the worst day of his life, but sure, he nods again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We got drunk and ignored it until it became a memory and a testament to Sehun’s overdramatic ass.” He says confidently, Kyungsoo feels his own confidence build again, that’s true, thinking desperately about conjectures or about events that have already come and gone won’t do him any good, it has certainly never done any good until now “And then I might have keyed the side of his car.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” Kyungsoo’s eyes widen to their fullest potential,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No matter what happens, we’ll get over this too! You’ll confess and whatever his response is we’ll get a drink and pizza and we’ll both pretend that we won’t cry about it when we turn off the lights and start watching a movie. It doesn’t matter if they will be happy tears or sad ones… It’ll all work out!” Baekhyun’s forehead hits Kyungsoo’s with a way too loud bonk and starts pushing against him “Right?” Kyungsoo instinctually pushes back, making them look like two unnecessarily frilly, dolled up bulls fighting head to head.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey…” Yixing’s head is peeking from behind the door, Kyungsoo and Baekhyun turn to look at him with their heads still attached to each other “Sorry to interrupt,” he’s reasonably confused, “I have a rehearsal in a few minutes, can you give me the list?” he smiles, bubbly and bright. Kyungsoo can’t even begin to describe the string of feelings that stumble over each other in his heart.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure.” Kyungsoo straightens up and composes himself, he touches his fringe to make sure it’ll fall back in place. Yixing pushes the door and keeps it open for him as he passes through,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought I might get a little peek while you changed,” In his head, Kyungsoo begs Yixing to let him breathe for one second, he’s just gotten out of an intense vulnerability session with Baekhyun, he’s not sure he has the emotional power to be horny with him right now.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? You like uniforms too?” Kyungsoo walks to the counter, he reaches behind it to get one of the notepads for the orders and a pen,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I like you.” Yixing says. The pen flies out of Kyungsoo’s hand and falls straight to the ground, he squats down to get it and stare at the floor in silence, dead tired.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You mean it?” he asks and he’s not able to look at what expression Yixing is making, because he truly means it, he wants to know, but the timing is not right. He’s not scared that rejection might affect his work, he just wants to be selfish and go to Yixing’s house tonight and spend time with him before really getting rejected, even if it’s just one last time before the end. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m just joking.” Kyungsoo gets out quickly, he turns to look at Yixing but his eyes only stare at his half opened lips, afraid of looking at anything else on his face “Here’s the list, I’ll see you tonight.” he smiles,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Great! Thank you!” Yixing kisses his cheek and floats away, Kyungsoo finally breathes again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>⚜</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo has been in Yixing’s apartment only a couple of times before. He lives with an army of roommates that know no boundaries, living in the kind of shared, free environment that doesn’t favour the sort of activities that they engage with when they meet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Based on the memories that Kyungsoo has of that house, he fears it might be too chaotic even to concentrate to work on sewing. His worries are confirmed as he makes his way up the stairs of the old building and he is hit by the loud sound of drums coming from the highest floor, Yixing’s floor. it’s already nine in the evening and yet he doesn’t hear anyone complain about it. At the same time, he doubts anyone that complains about that sort of thing could live in a building as moldy and decrepit as this in the first place.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo grips the handle of his sewing machine carrier and continues up the stairs, he sees something move in front of him as he turns on the third floor, he doesn’t know if what has just crossed his path was a cat or a mouse, but he convinces himself that investigating further surely won’t do him any good.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo understands the absence of complaints a bit better once he reaches the fourth floor, seeing that the entire building seems to be gathered on the threshold of Yixing’s apartment, joining in the loud, rhythmic sounds of percussions. On top of the crowd, Kyungsoo sees Chanyeol’s red head of fluffy hair discuss animatedly with a guy pointing at a couple of bongos. Kyungsoo pushes his way inside, someone whistles as he passes and he flips them off without even looking back at them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Kyungsoo!” Yixing appears out of thin air, the amount of smoke around him makes him look hazy, like a spirit come to save Kyungsoo from this smelly hell.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What is going on here?” He asks as Yixing drags him deeper inside the apartment and into the only room without people inside, Kyungsoo isn’t sure it could even fit people inside with how much stuff is gathered on the floor.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Chanyeol and the guy from the second floor are arguing about drums… I'm not really sure what’s going on either, to be honest.” He shrugs, his zebra long sleeved shirt rides a bit down his shoulders “I’ve bought everything you’ve asked for, the lady at the fabric store was really nice, she even complimented my coat!” Yixing recounts as he drops to his knees and starts moving away the piles of books and music scores scattered on the pavement. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo steps on everything that obstructs his way, not even thinking about taking off his shoes and feeling nothing but cold, unforgiving feelings towards such a mess. If Yixing and his roommates cared about these things they would not be on the floor, so vulnerable to be stepped on by heavy platform shoes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing sits down and puts a pillow over the area he’s cleaned, he pats it down gently, inviting Kyungsoo to sit there.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do we need a table?” he asks startling on his seat, like the thought has physically hit him,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you have one…” Kyungsoo looks around skeptically,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I do, I do!” Yixing stands up again and opens the closet on the right side of the bunk beds, he pulls out a folding table and pops it down in front of Kyungsoo. By this point Kyungsoo is hugging his sewing machine, his only anchor of sanity in this mess.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Get me the fabric, while I look for a model online.” he leaves the sewing machine on the table and opens his small, raven shaped bag to fish his phone out of it</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yessir!” Yixing reaches under the single bed behind them and pulls out the familiar </span>
  <em>
    <span>Starry Sewing Supplies </span>
  </em>
  <span>paper bag. Its clean design and pastel colors helps Kyungsoo breathe and stop thinking that he should get on his feet and start cleaning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing drops on his right, his bare knee, peeking out of his torn jeans, brushes against his thigh, first only minutely, then deliberate and insistent. Kyungsoo ignores it as he scrolls past rows of designs on the bright screen of his phone; eventually, Yixing, seemingly dying to get his attention, comes closer to him and pulls his right hand off the device to hold it in his.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His chin poses on Kyungsoo’s shoulder, Kyungsoo can hear him breathe in before he speaks, “Thank you for coming.” sweet words coated in an even more sugary tone, the breath hitting Kyungsoo’s cheek seems to stick to his skin like caramel.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No problem,” Kyungsoo’s nose twitches, the gulp of nervousness he’s had to down before speaking echoed too loudly in his ears, he’s convinced Yixing could hear it even over the drums and cymbals being played outside “I’ve never done anything like this before, so I’m pretty curious to try it out…” He explains, feeling nervous, but still giddy to be so close to Yixing in such a way.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He sees Yixing shift from his side, his free hand comes up, meanwhile the other starts to play with his fingers. He lays a soft touch on Kyungsoo’s cheek and pushes lightly, Kyungsoo follows the motion mindlessly, turning his head to face Yixing. He holds him there for a moment, his cold hand on his cheek, feels even colder as Kyungsoo’s blood rushes to his face and tints his cheeks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hi.” he whispers with a small smile, his full lips curl prettily as he moves forward and kisses Kyungsoo’s.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“...Hi.” Kyungsoo feels something in him melt, his posture becoming less stiff, thoughts of the mess around him all gone. When Yixing commands his attention, there’s no space to think about anything else.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s already so late, Kyungsoo is used to getting in bed at eleven during the week, sometimes even earlier if his day has been particularly demanding. Now it’s close to ten and the people outside haven’t stopped playing and Yixing and Kyungsoo haven’t even gotten the fabric out of the paper bag it came in. All they’ve been doing is hum and grunt, while making out half sitting on top of each other, Yixing’s hand travelling down to grope his ass and groan out shameless comments that make both of them laugh.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s stupid under so many aspects, but Kyungsoo can’t stop indulging, both Yixing and himself have rarely struggled with self control, at least while sober, and yet they’ve spent the better part of an hour cuddling and wasting time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo opens his eyes, the tip of his nose brushing against Yixing’s, he breathes in deeply and cranes his neck, leaving one last kiss under Yixing’s ear, “We need to start, I have class tomorrow morning.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay…” Yixing’s voice is nothing more than a feeble string of shapeless vowels, his lids are heavy over his unfocused gaze, he’s flushed and a bit sleepy, Kyungsoo knows he probably doesn’t look much different. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Detaching themselves from each other makes the atmosphere turn a little strange, to the point of making Kyungsoo think that he was more comfortable with Yixing’s hand under his skirt and his back all twisted, than now that he’s sitting all right and proper, with a soft pillow under his behind and all the space he needs to breathe.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re starting,” Kyungsoo pats Yixing’s thigh and clears his throat, reminding himself what he’s supposed to be thinking about. He takes out his measuring tape and his heavy scissors, puts everything on the small table in front of him in orderly rows. Yixing just looks at him from the side, he’s pinching his lower lip distractedly and Kyungsoo feels his gaze on his busy hands, although he can tell that he’s not really looking at them, his head must surely be travelling somewhere far from this messy room.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Get up.” Kyungsoo snaps his fingers in front of his nose, startling Yixing out of his reveries, Yixing stares at him in silent confusion for a few seconds, he finally moves only after Kyungsoo gestures for him to get on his feet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do I have to take off my clothes?” he asks, playing with the lower end of his ugly shirt, putting on that fake air of innocence that amuses him so much,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop trying to derail the attention,” Kyungsoo grumbles, “And your clothes are so tight, it won’t make any difference if they’re on or not.” Yixing laughs heartily, extending his arms to his sides and standing straight, all tight and stiff</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My measurements are ready to be taken!” he raises his chin and closes his eyes, Kyungsoo isn’t sure what kind of invasive procedure he’s expecting, the reaction pulls a snort out of him. Kyungsoo raises to his feet too, looping the measuring tape on Yixing’s body. First around his chest, then his waist and his hips.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m kind of excited, I’ve never seen you work before.” Yixing’s eyes open, his voice is quiet, Kyungsoo almost misses it among the loud voices coming from the other side of the closed door of the room they’re in.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I thought you said we were going to do it together? Are you trying to make me do all the work?” Kyungsoo asks jokingly, he’s not sure Yixing could actually help much, one person is probably going to be more than enough.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know, that’s not what I meant…” he can hear the pouting in his voice, but he doesn’t raise his eyes to look at him,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why do you need a bodysuit anyways? Why not just a shirt?” Kyungsoo straightens up and poses the measuring tape on Yixing’s shoulder, while he continues the conversation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know… Isn’t it kind of sexy?” he shrugs, plopping back to the floor, following Kyungsoo, who’s just retaken his spot on the pillow.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not really… Leotards make me think of ladies from the eighties doing aerobics.” Kyungsoo pulls the fabric out of the bag, surprised to find a simple black with just a touch of shimmer; from Yixing he expected the worst kind of patterns and colors. The fabric itself is quite sturdy, a detail that takes a big hurdle off his shoulders, his skills with stretchy fabrics are laughable, he’s glad he won’t have to have a battle with lycra at this time of the evening.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh… So you’re not looking forward to see me wear it?” Yixing’s elbow lands on the table producing a loud, scary sound that makes Kyungsoo fear for its stability; Yixing is unphased, though, he poses his cheek in his hands and pulls a sad face, it’s exaggerated, Kyungsoo can see that clearly, but he thinks there’s something more hiding behind his theatrical reaction. Wishful thinking maybe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo turns to look at him with an artificially empty look, if he wants to preserve what’s left uncovered of his feelings, he’s better off not answering.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on, it’s not fun if you don’t play along.” Yixing’s chin hits Kyungsoo’s shoulder again and it stays there even as Kyungsoo unfolds the fabric, it slips off him only when Kyungsoo stands up, trying to look for a spot on the floor to lay down the fabric and the paper to cut the pattern of what they’re creating.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You should clean up once in a while,” Kyungsoo shakes his head and uses his foot to move a handful of take out boxes away from him “I think I’ve seen a mouse on the stairs, he’s gonna move in here if you’re not careful.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, yeah… No, of course, we’ve never had a mouse in here.” His entire face becomes tight, his voice sounds mechanical, he’s going out of his way to seem like a bad liar. Kyungsoo has to stop what he’s doing and control his gag reflex.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s so fucking gross, Yixing, why are you living like this?” If it were anyone else Kyungsoo would have already packed his bags and rushed out of there, but Yixing has him completely under his badly dressed twink spell and he can’t break free from it no matter how much he tries.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, I know! It’s Aarif that leaves the grossest stuff around,” petulant like a child making excuses to stand up against his dad’s scolding “I leave some clothes around… And books, but he’s the one-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay, it’s okay, I get it.” Kyungsoo puts down the fabric, the paper makes a soft clicking noise as he smooths it over the black cloth, he reaches for his pencil and the rest of his tools to finally start working “I’m surprised that you never stink, considering where you live.” he says instead and bites his tongue as it leaves his lips. It sounded way ruder than he intended. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I shower like ten times a day, it would be weird if I stank.” He crosses his arms, his tone makes Kyungsoo think that he might have touched a sensitive topic and it makes him regret saying it even more.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Isn’t that a bit too much?” he wants to keep the conversation going and move far from his slip ups. He’s rarely talked with Yixing like this and he doesn’t want it to stop this early. He wants to test it for a little longer; just the two of them sharing thoughts in such a normal way without trying to rile up each other at every chance they get</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“One when I wake up, then after the morning shift, then after class, then after my afternoon job, one after my night shift or, if I’m performing, after the performance… It’s not ten, but you get the point.” As he speaks, Yixing extends his legs with a pained grimace and turns to the left to look at his bed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Three shifts a day?” it comes out muffled, seeing as half of Kyungsoo’s lips are occupied with holding a couple of thin pins; he’s glad it does, though, because if it weren’t for that, his voice would have betrayed his concern.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah…” They’ve never talked about this and Yixing holds a long pause, Kyungsoo can only wonder what kind of thoughts might be running through his head, “My mom can’t send me money, so… At least I only have one tomorrow!” he shows Kyungsoo two peace signs and his cute dimpled smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo has always known about Yixing’s working situation, but he’s never heard anything about the reason and he doesn’t really know how to react now that Yixing is sharing it with him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She needs the money to help my grandparents, I wish I could help her too, but I’m barely hanging on as it is.” Kyungsoo looks at him as a bit of melancholy tints his features, he shakes it off as he climbs on his bed and rolls on his stomach. Kyungsoo pulls the pins out of his mouth and stands up, his heart is sinking down to his stomach. “I’ll be able to help them soon, though. All this hard work will definitely pay off.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He wishes he could say confidently that he can help him, he could tell him that he can move into his and Minseok’s apartment, he wishes he could ease some of that weight off his shoulders. If Yixing were his boyfriend he wouldn’t even hesitate.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t look at me like that,” Yixing waves his hand around, as if the air he’s moving will wipe the worry from Kyungsoo’s face “I didn’t share that to make you feel bad. I don’t like seeing my friends worry about me. See, I’m healthy and I get to do what I love, I couldn’t ask for anything more.” He flexes one of his arms and pats his bicep, showing it proudly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Yixing puts down the embers of Kyungsoo’s unprompted meddling and makes sure he’s aware of what his place is. Kyungsoo knows he probably isn’t doing it on purpose, but the timing couldn’t have been any better to remember to him that he’s just a friend, one that occasionally shares the same bed as him, but that until a few moments ago knew virtually nothing of something that’s so important to Yixing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A few weeks ago he would have been nothing but an acquaintance and even though the progress in their relationship kindles feeble hopes, everything still feels too unstable, too vague to make Kyungsoo’s nervous heart believe that they could grow into something more than friends.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo crosses the distance between them and leans over the bed, the kiss he leaves on Yixing’s forehead feels nice, feels right and his chest tightens at the sight of Yixing’s small smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re so sweet.” Yixing tries to pull him on the bed, but Kyungsoo’s dodging is quick and he retreats to his fabrics amidst Yixing’s signature, goofy laughter.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The time continues to travel in the room even as their conversation dies down. The noise coming from the outside has quietened, the voices arguing and the insistent sound of percussions have left their spot to the voice of a girl humming over a slow guitar tune. Kyungsoo works on their project seriously, taking only small breaks to go to the bathroom and to grab something to drink from the almost empty fridge.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s head clears easily after a few sips of fresh water, his focus relights and devotes itself to the black, sparkly fabric and from time to time, to Yixing’s soft snoring coming from the bed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Perception of the time and the space around him is lost and everything seems to fall back into place only when the door of the room opens and a familiar voice speaks from behind it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you decent?” Chanyeol’s husky whisper echoes loudly in the silent apartment, the dark colour of his tone making it sound too loud. Kyungsoo hadn’t even realized that all the music had stopped.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes,” Kyungsoo’s own deep voice forces itself into the same awkward adjustments to the volume with the same questionable results as Chanyeol.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Kyungsoo?! Have you not slept at all?” Concern oozes off Chanyeol’s scandalized expression. His reaction has Kyungsoo’s head finally start functioning by following human rules again and he begins to feel the sluggishness that has overcome his body, the familiar prickly sensation settling at the tip of his fingers, the sort of sensory onslaught that’s just an elaborate alarm asking him to get himself in a bed. “It’s almost five!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck,” Kyungsoo looks at the almost finished bodysuit in his hands and at Yixing’s face, already sleeping deeply, his body splayed over the comforter and his mouth open, a drop of drool rolling from the left side of his lips “I have class tomorrow… Today.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo raises the piece of clothing in his hands and looks over it quickly, he goes a bit cross-eyed as he focuses on a seam and takes it as a sign that he should stop working on it for now. He’s glad he’s worn an old, cheap dress that he won’t mind sleeping in and that he’s thrown in his eyes disposable lenses or he would have gone to sleep with them on, nothing would have convinced him to pose things that go in his eyes into anything that has spent time inside this house.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thinking about it, Yixing lives in this house and he has put what is his most prized possession inside him more times than he can remember. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>One last delirious thought to really convince him that It’s time for bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Aarif and Ronghao are out, you can take any of those beds,” Chanyeol points at the bunk beds, but Kyungsoo has only one bed in his radar and he crawls towards it silently, suddenly feeling the gentle daze of slumber lay its warm hands over him. He finally takes off his shoes and climbs next to Yixing, he pulls the covers from under him and settles it over both of them, he’s so light and all limp, gangly limbs, Kyungsoo laughs lightly at how resistant his sleep seems to be. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He must have been really tired, Kyungsoo’s lips tug downwards, as he poses his head on the only pillow. Once Kyungsoo hears Chanyeol walk out and close the door behind him, he pulls Yixing towards him, he shifts in his hold, snuggling tightly against his chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t even get to see you work…” Yixing’s words are slurred and muffled by Kyungsoo’s front.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did I wake you? Sorry,” Kyungsoo kisses the top of his head, Yixing hums,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“...I always sleep better when we’re together.” Yixing pushes until Kyungsoo rolls on his back and he settles on him, his face finding a perfect spot above Kyungsoo’s shoulder “</span>
  <em>
    <span>We intertwine our fingers, and can fall into sleep, we can sink deep into the dream</span>
  </em>
  <span>…” Kyungsoo recognizes the lines sung in Japanese from Aegen, the Malice Mizer song.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What was that?” he asks amused, meanwhile he attempts to pass off his snuggling closer as a mindless gesture; he doubts Yixing would care even if he left the action pass as deliberate.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Singing your favorite song.” His voice is gradually becoming more muddled, sleep is already claiming him back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not this one either.” The tiredness doesn’t let Kyungsoo control his expressions, so the smile that blossoms on his face is wide and satisfied, looking more and more like a dumb, happy grin. His arms hug Yixing’s waist and he closes his eyes, ready to rest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s one second later and Kyungsoo’s eyelids open in a flash, so wide that he fears his eyes might fall out of his skull. His nose inhales sharply and he gulps down his nervousness loudly, when he realizes that this is the perfect atmosphere for him to push his luck and ruin it with a confession.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yixing…I-” He’s not sure what he’ll achieve with this, but he tells himself it’ll be worth it, even if it’s just to pull himself out of a situation that is hurting him. </span>
  <span>His hands are sweating so hard, he’s probably damping the entire back of Yixing’s ugly zebra shirt “I might… Like” it’s the most difficult thing he’s ever had to say, the way he has to pull it out of himself so forcibly is clear proof of it “...You.” he finally finishes, with his eyes clenched shut and cringing silently.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s unfortunate that by the time the words leave his lips, the only response he gets is a single loud snore. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kyungsoo’s eyes roll, but he also laughs lightly at yet another heart stroke he’s just barely survived. He fears he won’t be able to sleep a wink, but all it takes is for him to close his eyes to be transported directly into the next day. When he opens them again, the sun is high in the sky and he’s alone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yixing has gone out for his only work shift of the day, but Kyungsoo’s heart is still thumping against his chest, as if he were permanently stuck into those few seconds from the night before, relentlessly reliving every word in his head and beating himself up, praying that Yixing really didn’t hear his late night delirium. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He bites his dark nails for the entire time, while making the last adjustments to the bodysuit, and he makes sure to leave before Yixing comes back.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>songs in this chapter:<br/>Cassis: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37dGDZ0hlB4<br/>Victims of love: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDKrDSmyQao (translation:https://sites.google.com/site/lyricsyndrome/lyrics/buck-tick/victims-of-love-with-kokushoku-sumire)<br/>Cherry saku yuuki: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBr4wuTLpYE<br/>Ma chérie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYV5n9WGJhw</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyungsoo’s drinking vodka straight, it’s only ten pm, but Baekhyun’s continuous talking is making him wish to drop to the floor blacked out drunk.</p><p>“2019 was not my year, I can say that for sure.” He’s sipping on a bright pink drink, a stronger shade of the hue of the sweet lolita dress he has on: dreamy, peachy pink decorated with a pattern of pastel clouds and small, chubby birds “Just this year, I’ve had my first car accident, I got dumped by the richest boyfriend I’ve ever had and I’ve lost the most stupid bet in the history of gambling.”</p><p>“That last one is not true.” Jongdae says from where he’s sitting, on the ugly fuschia cushions of the Exoplanet couches “It’s only the 25th, there’s a lot of time until the end of the year.”</p><p>Kyungsoo turns away from his friends, looking at the group performing Cassis by the The GazettE on the stage, doing what he can to keep himself out of the conversation.</p><p>“No, that’s over. Kyungsoo is so desperate, it feels bad to make fun of him when he’s like that.” Baekhyun shakes his head and takes another sip, he makes an unnecessary, annoying sucking sound as the liquid approaches his lips. </p><p>The dramatic tone in his voice and inconspicuous side glances, make Kyungsoo think that Baekhyun hasn’t actually let go of the stupid bet and is just waiting for the most favourable moment to let his agenda unravel. Kyungsoo clicks his tongue, thinking about the night at Yixing’s house and if it’ll be worth it to let Baekhyun know about his failed attempt. </p><p>“Yixing’s wearing clothes that you’ve made for him, that sounds pretty intimate to me…” Jongdae keeps pressing, Kyungsoo glares at him, he wishes Junmyeon could arrive faster, so Jongdae can focus on making fun of him and leave him alone,</p><p>“Stop it, you all own at least one piece of clothing I’ve made.” Kyungsoo sits back, he takes one last sip of his drink and prays that it’ll at least make him tipsy.</p><p>“Good evening!” Junmyeon is finally here, his eighteenth century vampire aesthetic looking as obsessively detailed as always “I’ve seen Chanyeol and the others go towards the stage, I’m glad I got here in time!” and his way of speaking, as well as his light, gentle voice also artfully clash with his hauntingly accurate appearance just as usual.</p><p>Kyungsoo becomes giddy as Junmyeon relays the info, he hasn’t seen Yixing wear his creation yet and he’s excited to finally see it being worn. All the information he’s had about it has been a short<em> love it! </em> and a long string of heart emojis at five p.m. the day after his all-nighter at Yixing’s apartment.</p><p>He’s not looking forward to what kind of questionable pieces of clothing he’s certainly paired it with it, but he’d also be lying if he said he’s not happy to know that Yixing will be wearing something that he’s made for him.</p><p>The stage is hit by red lights and the brighter ones illuminating the rest of the club dim down gradually, making the five figures tinted in crimson the only focus of the room.</p><p>Kyungsoo sees Ronghao step forward, the vibrant green of his guitar is muted by the lighting, but Kyungsoo can see his fingers move clearly over the strings. He plays a familiar melody, breaking the heavy coat of silence that had just settled; everyone in the club listens quietly and Kyungsoo sees the crowd under the stage sway lightly, following the notes being played.</p><p>Baekhyun stands up and pulls Kyungsoo by his wrist, they walk quickly towards the crowd and his friend elbows his way through, until they’re almost at the front. </p><p>From the new position, Kyungsoo is able to appreciate Yixing at a much closer distance than what is probably healthy for him. His legs are hidden under long, flowy fabric, pure black and so light that it glides over his thighs as he walks towards the microphone; the legs are a couple of centimeters too long with some of the fabric pooling at his bare feet. The high waistline hugs his slight curves perfectly and meets the tight bodysuit almost seamlessly, the sparkly fabric adheres to him like a second skin, the fit on the length of his arms and around his neck is precisely like Kyungsoo had envisioned it. </p><p>Yixing looks perfect, tasteful, but still eccentric. Maybe not really that eccentric for Yixing’s standards, but he falls right under Kyungsoo’s beloved sobriety with just a touch of eclecticism. For once Kyungsoo can look at one of Yixing’s outfits and think that in a hopelessly dire, desperate situation he might be able to wear it. Although, it’s hard not to think that something’s amiss.</p><p>Yixing’s face is covered by a big, black hat, his long fingers keep one edge of the large brim down to cover his eyes. His lips open and his voice is dark and slow, in contrast with the brighter rhythm of the guitar, they complement each other beautifully. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Still smiling like I'm frozen </em>
</p><p>
  <em> The warmth of your skin passing me by </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Kyungsoo mouths the words with him, his voice stuck in his throat. </p><p>Yixing’s singing is soft and smooth, light as he sings of unrequited love. His hands tremble as they brush the length of the mic stand, his fingers leave touches as light as a breath and Kyungsoo feels their ghost on his own skin.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> When we hold each other, my heart falters </em>
</p><p>
  <em> When we comfort each other, it doesn’t last </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Suddenly the drums are being hit and Yixing opens his arms, his voice turns rougher and louder, that same edge of raspiness that Kyungsoo adores hearing asa it mixes into his sweet tone. Long nights come to mind, their bodies twisting around each other, nothing between them other than Kyungsoo’s unspoken adoration and Yixing’s smooth voice becoming raw.</p><p>The song picks up from there, Kyungsoo stares at Yixing in silence as the people around him sing along with him. He keeps his position at the centre, it’s so strange to not see him crawling on his hands and knees after the first chorus, but he’s just as captivating as he holds his head high and his shoulders straight and wide, graceful and subtle with the mindless movements of his hands.</p><p>Kyungsoo sees him look out over the crowd and then his eyelids becoming heavy as he throws his head back and screams into the microphone. He stops as the guitars enter their solo, his eyes still search the club until they settle on the crowd, on Kyungsoo’s frozen, enamoured form.</p><p>His feet, the tips of his fingers become cold and his breathing shallow as their eyes meet.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Give me a kiss </em>
</p><p>
  <em> On this, the last night </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Now us two are victims of love </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You are a dream </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I am a dream </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Ah love me, victims of love </em>
</p><p> </p><p>He sings what’s left of the song with his eyes branding burning marks over Kyungsoo. His gaze feels like fire, incinerating everything around them, Kyungsoo’s surroundings shrink as Yixing takes the mic off its stand and walks to the edge of the stage, then jumps off while the song continues on with its instrumental section.</p><p>He walks directly towards him, Kyungsoo feels claustrophobic, trapped in Yixing’s dark eyes. Yixing is on him before he can realize it, the front of his hat folding against the top of Kyungsoo’s head and his eyes closing as he kisses his lips.</p><p>His hands pose gently at the back of Kyungsoo’s head, he keeps his gaze fixated on him, while the microphone raises back to his lips, singing the chorus into it one more time. </p><p>Thousands of thoughts run in Kyungsoo’s head, vicious and viscous, they pass by and leave traces behind; he thinks he wants to push him away, he wants to kiss him, he wants to confess and stop holding up a façade that doesn’t suit him.</p><p>A straightforward, simple man like Kyungsoo caught into a game of boundaries and tests, there was no way he would have lasted long in a relationship so fleeting, Kyungsoo is a earthy man, he needs ground, rocks and clarity. If he decides to devote himself to something he needs to do so completely, on the other hand Yixing has already so much on his plate, Kyungsoo can’t pretend that he will decide to waste energies being serious with him.</p><p>“How does it look?” Yixing asks away from the microphone as the instrumental that the rest of his group is playing turns experimental. </p><p>“It looks nice…” Kyungsoo’s hands take their favorite spot on Yixing’s waist “You look amazing.” it comes out quickly without giving him any time to think about it.</p><p>“Wow, a compliment?” Yixing poses a hand on his chest, the surprised expression on his face quickly turns treacherous “I’m joking, I knew you were going to like it.” He tries to mask his smile with a bite to his lower lip, but all it achieves is that it makes him look even hotter “I already know you so well…” a chirp lilt to his voice, “And we were playing your favorite song as well...” It’s more of a backhanded inquiry than an affirmation, Yixing is side-eyeing him, gauging his reaction. </p><p>“It wasn’t, though.” Kyungsoo almost thinks about finally telling him the actual answer to the question he seems to be obsessed by, but eventually decides against it, not wanting to lower the interest that Yixing is devoting to him. </p><p>“Seriously?!” Yixing’s disappointed exclamation is so loud that it’s picked up by the mic; Kyungsoo laughs and the tension between them fades away. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to the way Yixing can shift the mood so easily and unexpectedly, </p><p>“Next time, I’ll get it right, for sure!” he exclaims as he poses his index finger on Kyungsoo’s lips and the atmosphere takes a turn once more. His index finger pushes between his black lips, looking for a way inside, Kyungsoo bites the tip lightly, not letting Yixing push further than it would be appropriate.  </p><p>“I’ll be at yours at one, will you wait for me?” Yixing’s tilts his head, chasing Kyungsoo’s gaze, his eyes are back to being dark and heavy,</p><p>“Yeah...” Always. </p><p>Yixing smiles and turns back, he pulls a random guy from the crowd and makes him help at getting him back on top of the stage. He turns to look over his shoulder, completely aware of Kyungsoo’s eyes being stuck on the cut on the back of the bodysuit and on the sight of the expanse of his naked back. A small whim that Kyungsoo has added to the design while Yixing had been asleep, he thought he might suit him, but the results goes beyond everything he was imagining. </p><p>“Yixing... Keeps getting hotter…” A girl speaks from somewhere behind Kyungsoo’s back, </p><p>“Yeah, but he’s done with you.” Someone else responds, their speech interrupted by a thunderous laugh. Kyungsoo tries to act disinterested, while his ears work really hard to catch what the two strangers are saying.</p><p>“Like you’re any better! He’s just not hooking up anymore… Maybe he found someone.” The girls speaks again, but not even a second passes before they break into laughter,</p><p>“Yeah, right…” </p><p>Kyungsoo gulps around nothing, his tongue feels like sandpaper against the roof of his mouth as he tells Baekhyun that he’ll move to the bar. His chest hurts, strained by a dangerous concoction of jealousy and more bad, unprompted feelings mixing under his skin.  </p><p>He leaves Exoplanet the moment Yixing is done with his set. The journey home is a complete blur, he ignores easily the judging eyes that he’s usually so conscious of. He fidgets with the bordeaux velvet of his dress, the texture feels uneven under his fingers, he tries to count its ridges in his head to keep himself calm, but it doesn’t work.</p><p>The clicking noises of his keys unlocking his door echo in the silence of his apartment building. Kyungsoo’s brain finds it impossible to not remember Yixing’s living conditions and compare them with his.</p><p>It’s easy to follow the same train of thought and end up thinking what it would be like if he were sharing the place with Yixing. He probably wouldn’t like Minseok and Kyungsoo’s sterile little home; for someone like him, living with the two of them would certainly be a hassle. Compared to his life, Kyungsoo and his house are far too straight-laced, or to put it more bluntly, boring.</p><p>Kyungsoo takes his shoes off and steps inside, beelines for the kitchen, looking for refreshments.</p><p>Tonight is <em> the night </em>, he decides.  </p><p>He hasn’t been honest with himself in a long time, but continuing this way will certainly start bothering Yixing soon. Kyungsoo knows Yixing’s too nice to cut him off on his own and the last thing he wants to do is to add to Yixing’s already sizeable baggage of worries, so if anyone has to take a step forward and try to find a solution, it has to be him. It’s time for Kyungsoo to own up to his feelings once and for all. This time not by whispering his confession in a dark room, hoping that Yixing won’t hear it, but by speaking his mind clearly through the fog of uncertainty that has been building around him in this past months.</p><p>Fuck Baekhyun and fuck his stupid bet, it’s their fault and no one else’s that Kyungsoo is being forced to think and face reality. He would not be in such a tight spot if it weren’t for them. </p><p>Of course, he’ll be thanking them if things take the most unexpected of turns, but for now, Baekhyun is a demon and he’ll never get his hands on any of his dresses, not even the cheapest of camisoles.</p><p>The sound of the intercom pulls Kyungsoo away from the curses he was ready to send Baekhyun’s way. Kyungsoo walks to the front door and answers curtly. A cute “It’s me!” comes from the other side of the line, Kyungsoo presses the button and opens the door for  him, barely keeping his finger from puncturing through the device and the entire wall. Nothing sends him into imaginary fits of violence like Yixing being awful and adorable.</p><p>“I might have traumatized the old woman living on the third floor,” Yixing walks in, sighing out in relief as he unzips his platform boots and gets them off. Kyungsoo grimaces at the appearance of bare feet without socks or tights. “She scared me too though, what was she doing out at this hour?” He wiggles his shoulders and finally steps out of the foyer, aiming at Kyungsoo who’s leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.</p><p>“Missed me?” Yixing pecks his lips and walks past him without taking off his white faux fur coat,</p><p>“Not really.” Lies,</p><p>“Lies!” Kyungsoo is startled by that, but then Yixing laughs and throws himself on the couch, the perfectly positioned pillows are thrown into disarray.</p><p>“Do you want something to drink?” Kyungsoo walks into the living area,</p><p>“No,” He’s wiggling around in his enormous coat, he’s blissful and blushing “Come here.” he opens his arms and makes kissy lips. Kyungsoo looks at him with judging eyes, extremely happy with all that’s happening, but also confused.</p><p>“The couch is off limits.” Kyungsoo sits down,</p><p>Yixing makes an indignant sound “I’m only asking for cuddles!” sounding offended at the implications of Kyungsoo’s words.</p><p>Kyungsoo turns to look at him, he leans forward to hover over Yixing’s face, still flushed red by the unforgiving cold he’s left out of the door. His eyes are defined by pitch black eyeliner, neat and precise over his lid and smudged on the outside of his eyes, his already beautiful, rich brown irises becoming sultry, liquid copper and gold burning scorchingly hot.</p><p>“Wanna move to the bed?” Kyungsoo asks, Yixing pauses and puts on a thoughtful expression, while he raises his hand to caress the length of Kyungsoo’s right arm</p><p>“Maybe…” Halfway through the response, his expression melts again and his full lips curl slyly “Need to take a shower first.”</p><p>“That…” Kyungsoo sneaks his right hand under the fur and strokes lightly Yixing’s side “Can wait.”</p><p>“Let’s have a bath together.” Yixing grasps Kyungsoo’s arm and pulls himself up, his chin lands on Kyungsoo’s shoulder. </p><p>“...Do you really need to hear me say it?” Kyungsoo sighs, he can’t be vocally explicit with the same ease as Yixing. Sure he has his moments when the timing is favorable, but his living room is the furthest from being the appropriate place for embarrassing dirty talk. </p><p>“Hear what?” Yixing presses, of course. He widens his eyes prettily and shrugs like he doesn’t realize what he’s doing.</p><p>Kyungsoo turns, his cheek brushes against Yixing’s forehead, he doesn’t seem to want to leave his spot on top of Kyungsoo’s shoulder for nothing in the world, not even uncomfortableness.</p><p>“I want to do it with you looking like this,” it’s nothing more than a whisper, because Kyungsoo would die if he had to listen to his own words resound in his silent apartment.</p><p>“Do what?” Yixing tries to play it off, but Kyungsoo can already feel how erratic he’s becoming, his breathing suddenly a lot louder and his lips dry under his bright red lipstick.</p><p>Kyungsoo scoots on the couch, until he’s facing Yixing completely and then springs off the soft cushion to trap him beneath himself “Stop teasing me.” the threat has no bite to it, other than the small nip he delivers to Yixing’s heavily accessorized ear.</p><p>“Say it.” Yixing sounds firmer than before, but his hands shake lightly as he starts playing with the fabric of Kyungsoo’s skirt “What are we going to do? Tell me.” he opens his legs and pulls Kyungsoo down by his skirt, their half hard dicks meet between them. Kyungsoo’s eyes close, his head thrown back, already turn on to the point of no return.</p><p>“If you don’t stop talking we won’t have time to do anything.” Kyungsoo hears the noise of fabric moving and then feels Yixing’s hands on the back of his thighs, quickly moving up to grope his ass.</p><p>“You’re mean and boring.” Yixing says it so lightly, he’s ready to put it past himself one second after saying it; but the words pierce through Kyungsoo’s chest like poisoned arrows and stay there, stuck in the core of his insecurities.  </p><p>“You’re bored with me?” He hates the way it sounded, he was supposed to say it jokingly, but the seriousness in his tone gives his real feelings away. Kyungsoo waits for a few moments, looking into Yixing’s puzzled expression, then quickly moves off him and sits back down far from him. </p><p>“What?” Yixing pulls himself up, he sounds confused, floored </p><p>“I wouldn’t blame you if that were the case. I know I’m meddlesome and… I’m always being mean to you.” Kyungsoo doesn’t have control of himself anymore, his mouth keeps opening and his voice forming sounds that he can’t stop.</p><p>“What is this about?” Yixing’s sweet voice sounds strained, there’s a hint of laughter among his words and Kyungsoo isn’t surprised to hear it, the situation must seem surreal to Yixing as much as it does to him.</p><p>“We’re really different, after all.” Kyungsoo looks at Yixing for a split second, the ache in his chest forces him to look down again “You must have a lot of better <em> friends </em> to be with.” </p><p>Kyungsoo knows what he’s doing and he’s ashamed of it. He’s running away and keeping inside everything he should be letting out, he’s walking the path of the worst approach to the situation. He knows, but in his mind, he makes excuses for himself: it’s late, he’s a bit tipsy; everything has been escalating so quickly this past month, it would have taken a toll on anyone.  </p><p>He should have just confessed and dealt with the consequences, but feelings are sly and it’s so easy to just let them speak for him, rash and single minded. Terrified of losing the person that makes him feel so much and at the same time, taking steps to distance himself from him.</p><p>“You think I still see other people?” Yixing stands up, he reaches the spot in front of Kyungsoo, but the latter doesn’t raise his eyes to look back at him.</p><p>“It’s not really any of my business anyway, no?” Kyungsoo grimaces, suddenly feeling guilt for having ruined their night and possibly everything else between them.</p><p>“Do you actually believe that or are you just trying to piss me off?” Yixing’s voice wavers slightly, the moment the sound of sniffling reaches Kyungsoo’s ears his head snaps up. </p><p>Yixing rubs at his eyes and his lips are kept shut in a tight line “Fuck.” their eyes meet and Yixing turns away immediately. A single tear, stained in washed out black, rolls down Yixing’s cheek and Kyungsoo can’t breathe, he’s frantic as he stands up.</p><p>“Wait,” Kyungsoo starts but he doesn’t know what to say.</p><p>“I’m going home.” Yixing walks past Kyungsoo and walks clumsily towards the front door.</p><p>“No, I didn’t mean to-” Kyungsoo isn’t entirely sure how they got here,</p><p>“What? Call me a whore? It’s fine, it’s true.” Kyungsoo reaches for Yixing’s arm, he needs to stop him and clear the air, he didn’t mean for any of this to happen, he needs to apologize “I thought… There was something good between us.” Kyungsoo takes his wrist and pulls, he breathes in, <em> he has to speak. </em></p><p>The words die on the tip of his tongue as they reach the foyer and find the front door opened. Minseok is standing on the threshold, he’s frozen still. Yixing shakes his arm out of Kyungsoo’s loosened hold, grabs his shoes and runs out of the door.</p><p>Kyungsoo and Minseok stay rooted in their spots for entire, slow minutes, looking at each other with questions running through their heads, which neither of them has the courage to voice.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>⚜</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>One small, white flake falls to the ground, passing directly in front of Kyungsoo’s nose. Soon many more follow, more gelid snow comes down to add to the white piles still gathered on the sides of the road, hiding the dirt, the traces of shoes and wheels under a fresh, new layer of untouched white.</p><p>What is he doing? Kyungsoo wonders, tortures himself with the same question. The cold bites at his hands and feet, even at his legs through the horrendous pair of sweatpants he has on. His beanie and his warm, puffed jacket are already starting to dampen. Kyungsoo clicks his tongue in the still, early morning silence, he thinks he’s grabbed Minseok’s jacket by mistake and he will definitely make him pay the cleaners’ bill.</p><p>Nothing is working out. Kyungsoo had been hoping so gaudily to see his wishes become reality, hiding behind a thick layer of self-deprecation he had finally decided to take the matter in his own hands. One unnecessary misstep later and all he’s achieved nothing other than hurting who he didn’t want to hurt the most.</p><p>Unspoken dreams of domesticity and cinema dates that he’s never got to do with Yixing play behind his eyelids every time he blinks, torturing his growing wounds with regret. Sometimes he thinks it’s better this way, but other times the guilt and disappointment are so heavy that it’s hard to breathe. He’s still not entirely sure of what Yixing meant with the last things he’s said, but the possibility of him liking him back is rooted at the back of his mind, making the regrets taste even more bitter. As of now, though, Kyungsoo doesn’t have the gut to do anything about it.</p><p>He hates having to work the morning shift on Thursday, usually it’s because he got tragically wasted the night before, but the case is slightly different today. The ghostly paleness of sleep deprivation and puffy under-eye bags are clear enough hints to guess what the actual reason might be. </p><p>He’s spent the night binging movies and shows and staring listlessly at the ceiling of his room, unable to fall asleep. It’s already been a week, but the situation hasn’t gotten any better.</p><p>Baekhyun still hasn’t arrived when he walks in, there’s only the manager, standing behind the register; she greets him with a simple “Good morning.” and then goes back to minding her business.</p><p>He remembers being so angry about the change of shifts and how many classes he has to skip every Thursday, but he’s glad for it today. A chance to ignore reality won’t do him any good in the long run, but it’s good enough for a momentary solution.</p><p>The changing room is always so cold in the morning, even his uniform, sitting in his small locker feels icy in his hands. He never complains about it when he has to put it on, but the complete numbness that has taken over his body is making it especially easy today. He pulls his tights up to his waist and then dresses up in complete silence, all while staring forlornly at the sad, bland tiles of the pavement. </p><p>It was supposed to be a short, straightforward confession, instead he’s been able to turn it into a weird self-pity trip accompanied by a good dose of insults he never even thought of directing at Yixing before. It was supposed to be simple, as simple as the familiar, calming silhouette of his black maid dress, the white fabric of his apron and the small strip of ruffled fabric perched on top of his wig.</p><p>Kyungsoo stares pensively at his reflection on the mirror, deciding to employ the last moments before the beginning of the shift to check his appearance.</p><p>He fiddles with his hair piece for much longer than he would have liked, but the white ruffle seems to not want to stay in place today; then moves his attention to the rest of his clothing, nothing seems to stick out, until he notices the loose thread coming from the tight wrist of his right sleeve. He twists and raises the arm to take a good look at it, his body moves on its own, to reach for the small scissors he always keeps in his emergency sewing kit with the aim of getting rid of the offending thread.</p><p>With a sigh that oozes satisfaction, he puts the kit back in his locker and then looks back into the mirror, crosses his arms and adjusts his face to the mean, unfriendly expression the manager wants him to keep on until the customers have to pay their bill. He feels kind of pathetic, when he isn’t able to break the solid mask of sadness settled on his face with artificial anger.</p><p>“Uh, scary.” Baekhyun peeks from above his shoulder and then walks behind him, he’s just arrived, clad in cherry red from the top of his wig to the bottom of his ugly sneakers.</p><p>“You’re late.” Kyungsoo’s still frowning, but he focuses on the flawless, orderly way in which his skirt falls on his form, dedicating most of his attention to what makes him the happiest.</p><p>“I know, Jongdae dragged me along to go shopping at the crack of dawn,” his voice comes out muffled as he pulls his form fitting, pretty, red dress over his head, instead of unzipping it like any normal human being would do “He’s nervous about his girlfriend visiting from China, he doesn’t know what to buy her. He bought couple t-shirts this morning... I was about to throw up.” Baekhyun sticks out his tongue, but stops immediately when he meets Kyungsoo’s eyes through the mirror and discards his dress with no care “You look so sad, it’s freaking me out.” </p><p>“Yeah.” Kyungsoo turns away from the mirror and bends down to adjust the straps of his shoes. </p><p>“Wow… I express an exaggerated view on your condition just to annoy you and you let me off this easily?” Baekhyun rushes by his side, still only wearing an over the top lingerie set and big, loud sneakers.</p><p>Kyungsoo just sighs and squats down, feeling his legs become limp; he has no energy to engage with Baekhyun’s provocations.</p><p>“Still feeling this bad? I’ll take you out again after the shift.” Baekhyun ducks down to be at his level, he circles an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulders.</p><p>“No, it’s fine. I have to study,” that’s right, classes are almost over and he has exams coming up, studying should be his priority. It would be nice if everything goes like it’s supposed to today, maybe instead of staring at the words on the pages without aim, he’ll be able to make something stick in his head.</p><p>“I didn't think I was ever going to say this, but you’re worrying even Minseok.” Baekhyun’s hand rubs tight circles over the expanse of Kyungsoo’s back; Kyungsoo stays still, basking in the touches, while he touches mindlessly the metal stars sewn all around his shoes “Both of our dearest, emotionless goths are feeling things... It’s not right.”</p><p>“I’ll get over it.” Kyungsoo sighs, “I just wanted to apologize before accepting defeat.”</p><p>“Is he still not answering your phone?” Baekhyun stands up and pulls Kyungsoo with him, both of them land confidently on the small plastic bench behind them.</p><p>“Yeah… And he avoids me in class. Kinda makes me think about all the times I did it to him.” Kyungsoo wants to rub his itchy eyes and smack his forehead, but the thick layer of white theater makeup stops him from going through with it.  </p><p>“You act tough but you’re a little bitch” Baekhyun stands back up quickly, he shoves Kyungsoo’s shoulder with a little too much force for Kyungsoo’s taste.</p><p>“That was unnecessary.” Kyungsoo glares at him, his thick eyebrows crease on his forehead, </p><p>“You’re unnecessary!” Baekhyun shoves him again, “Why are you getting ready to give up?! Corner him somewhere and tell him what you were supposed to say the other night!”</p><p>“Why would I do that if he clearly doesn’t want to see me?” Kyungsoo hits Baekhyun’s side and shoves him away too,</p><p>“Go wait for him at his part-time jobs! Go at his house! You’re regretting it so much, why aren’t you trying all you can to fix it?” Baekhyun shouts, his long, pointy nails dig into Kyungsoo’s shoulder “Why aren’t you being spontaneous now? Are you only spontaneous when you’re panicking and you need to cover your ass?”</p><p>Kyungsoo’s jaw tightens, hearing Baekhyun say it hurts, but he’s right. He’s even more convincing when he speaks next,</p><p>“Was all this time you’ve spent with Yixing so insignificant that you’re fine with just letting him get away?”</p><p>Kyungsoo looks at him, the edges of his vision swaying with the tears building up in his eyes. Kyungsoo shakes his head, he tries to deny but his mouth moves without producing any sound, the image of the same thing happening the last night he’s seen Yixing is enough to break the layer of salty sheen in his eyes and make it fall down his face. </p><p>He feels so stupid, he’s being fucking around with Yixing for less than six months, but he’s so in <em> love </em> with him. He wants to spend time with him indulging in their dumb banter and talking about clothes, about music and about each other. He wants to know everything Yixing’s willing to share with him, wants to see the lively glint in his eyes when he talks about performing and the bittersweet melancholy of the thoughts about his family, he wants it all and wants to offer himself back.</p><p>Kyungsoo’s head feels heavy in his palms, his fingers mess nervously with the pins holding his wig, as a bitter chuckle escapes his lips. </p><p>“Go wash your face, it’s almost time to start the shift.” Baekhyun is back by his side, his entire weight splayed on Kyungsoo’s back, his silent support crushing him.  </p><p>“I know you’re thinking that you’ve saved the situation once again, but none of this would have happened if you had just minded your business in the first place.” Kyungsoo moves up and pulls away from Baekhyun’s forceful hold, he pinches his side for good measure. </p><p>“Kyungsoo, I respect you, so I won’t pick apart your sad attempt at shifting the blame of your troubles onto myself, but in short, yes I did just save this situation and saved your life too-” he drones on for long minutes, but Kyungsoo just laughs it off, his mood slowly becoming better.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>⚜</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Kyungsoo doesn’t see Yixing in any of the few classes left before the end of the semester, his messages continue being ignored and all his calls turned down.</p><p>A few days ago, he had been ready to give up, but now there’s a new flame burning inside him. His determination, bordering onto desperation, gives him a new life force and enough nerve to call up Chanyeol and ask about Yixing’s daily schedule. </p><p>Chanyeol isn’t of much help, but at least he can tell Kyungsoo the locations of Yixing’s workplaces with superb accuracy. </p><p>The first stop is a music supplies store an hour away from Kyungsoo’s apartment, he gets there without any problems, but Yixing has just clocked out of the morning shift. So, Kyungsoo moves on to the next place, a huge second hand shop, Kyungsoo comes out with three blouses and a skirt, but still no Yixing.</p><p>He suddenly grows nervous as he approaches the last place, a supermarket, the certainty of being steps away from Yixing renders him apprehensive. It’s already pretty late in the afternoon, Kyungsoo hope the time of his appearance won’t bring any issues to Yixing’s workflow. Maybe he should just wait for him to get off and talk to him then, maybe he should just go home.</p><p>Before he can talk himself out of going through with his plans, he looks left and right and crosses the street dividing him from the store. Kyungsoo’s hands sweat profusely in his light, black, lace gloves, he fidgets distractedly with the emerald-like cameo at the base of his neck. </p><p>Kyungsoo steps seem to echo throughout the store as he steps inside, the automatic doors opening in front of him shriek catching the attention of guy behind the register. He gives Kyungsoo a long, thoughtful look and then looks back at an open door to the side, Kyungsoo peeks inside too, finding piles of boxes and a familiar figure standing in front of it.</p><p>“Yixing, one of your friends is here.” He turns back to Kyungsoo to give him a forced smile and then goes quickly back to flipping the pages of the magazine in his hands. </p><p>“Someone for me?” Yixing walks out of the storage room as he raises his bright green shirt with the logo of the store off his defined chest, using it to dry off his sweat. Kyungsoo stares at him, scared and eager to be noticed. Yixing’s reaction is lukewarm when their gazes finally meet, but Kyungsoo had been expecting it.</p><p>“Do you have a minute to spare?” he asks, he hopes Yixing will let him talk about their affairs far from his coworker’s sneaky glances. </p><p>“No, I’m working.” Yixing looks away and turns again to walk back into the storage. </p><p>“When does your shift end? I’ll wait.” It’s desperate and unashamed, if Yixing doesn’t give in,  Kyungsoo is afraid he’ll start begging.</p><p>“I don’t know, it depends.” Yixing walks out of his sight without adding anything else, the coworker is openly gaping at both of them, probably unaccustomed to seeing sweet, nice Yixing act like this. Kyungsoo ignores him and nods to himself as he walks back out, he knows it won’t end any later than ten, because that’s the time Yixing usually appears at the club. </p><p>The shrieking of the door drowns out the loud tapping of his shoes. He walks a few meters away from the store, not wanting the weird, sad goth to hinder the business. He reaches the small park by the station and with nothing better to do he just stands around, looking at the sky being painted in lilac and red by the sun setting somewhere behind the tall buildings around him. He doesn’t lean or sit anywhere fearing repercussions for his dress, but he continues to stand around the bare trees, sure that he’ll be noticed by Yixing when he'll leave the store. He plays distractedly with the little bat wings on the sides of his satchel bag, wondering if he should take his phone out to kill the two hours he’ll have to spend out here in the cold.</p><p>Not even ten minutes later, his ears twitch as they pick up the agony filled scream of the sliding doors, he raises his gaze in time to see Yixing’s figure run through them, wearing his coat over the work uniform.</p><p>Yixing’s face is twisted in what Kyungsoo can only interpret as anger. Since he’s known him, this is the second time Kyungsoo has seen him like this and it's not reassuring to think that both times he was the reason for it.</p><p>“Why are you waiting here? Go home, you’ll freeze.” He’s really coming closer now, his tone is concerned; still conscious and polite, even while seemingly being enraged.</p><p>“I need to talk to you.” Kyungsoo responds, he grits his teeth, not knowing what to expect next, he wonders on which dating sim route he’s in, from the looks of it, it feels like it’ll be the most devastating bad end of his life. Memories of Sehun’s throwing a fit at Exoplanet will feel like a joke after this.</p><p>Yixing doesn’t respond immediately, instead he picks up Kyungsoo’s gloved hands and leaves a small hot pack in his hold. </p><p>“What is it?” Yixing finally asks, pushing his hands in the pockets of his terrible red, vinyl pants.</p><p>“I wanted to apologize for what I’ve said the other night.” Kyungsoo takes a deep breath and pushes himself to the limit to look directly at Yixing, “And I’m not trying to make excuses, but I really didn’t mean for any of it to sound that way,”</p><p>“Yes, I know, it’s fine.” Yixing’s uses the tip of his cowboy boot to kick a stone off his path and keeps his gaze averted from Kyungsoo “I’m sorry too.”</p><p>Kyungsoo hums, the white hot pack in his hands and his own nerves are making sweat build up his palms at a worrying rate.</p><p>“That was it, so…” Kyungsoo starts, not having the gut to push any further, he takes a step back, ready to walk off on the opposite direction and get to the subway.</p><p>“Wait!” Yixing does what Kyungsoo had tried to do that night, he takes his arm and stops him from going away “Was that really it?” Kyungsoo can’t read the glint passing through Yixing’s eyes; his expression stands somewhere between relief and longing.</p><p>“I…” Kyungsoo breathes in, “Not really, but I doubt you would want to hear it now.” </p><p>The sparse hair of Yixing’s eyebrows furrow and suddenly his eyes are sure and fierce “Stop making decisions for me.” and throws Kyungsoo for a loop, which is what he does best, as he leaves his arm to take Kyungsoo’s head between his cold hands, his cheeks squished up and his lips puckered by his tight hold, all while Yixing glares daggers at him “Think carefully about what you’re going to say next.”</p><p>“We’re having a party for New Year’s Eve,” Kyungsoo’s words are muffled by the grip on his face, but he hopes Yixing can understand what’s he’s trying to say “I would be happy if you came.” He lays his hands over Yixing’s wrists and gently pulls them down, freeing himself. He’s sweating buckets, if he continues like this he’ll get the flu before being able to say anything else.</p><p> Kyungsoo keeps both of his hands in his, trying to warm him up with the hot pack and his own apprehension-induced rising temperature.</p><p>“I’ll see what I can do...” Yixing is a lot less serious, the severe lines that had marred his face are gone and Kyungsoo subconsciously makes a mental note to do his best to never anger him again. “It’s taking you <em> so </em>long... But I’ll let it slide, because you’re pretty.” Kyungsoo’s lips twitch, he wants to smile at Yixing using his words against him, but he can’t do it when the rest of Yixing’s words fuel Kyungsoo’s wildest fantasies.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>⚜</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Kyungsoo isn’t sure what got into him when he decided he would have cooked for all the people invited. On second thought, he knows very well what the reason is and it has one hundred percent to do with Yixing.</p><p>It’s the same reason that has persuaded him to bring out his best dress, the legendary sixty thousand yen Moi-même-Moitié in all its glory. Heavy, navy blue fabric, white rose lace all around the elegant cape collar and a fine line of more elaborate lace peeks out of the sleeves, the bottom of the skirt reaches Kyungsoo’s ankles and is decorated with three simple flounces.</p><p>The thick, navy fabric is pressed perfectly, without the shadow of one single crease, he’s passed his trusty iron over the large bow tied on the back of the dress carefully, to the point of scaring even his nearly obsessive-compulsive roommate.</p><p>He wants to impress and amaze, finally ready to get himself together and go above and beyond to employ all his energies towards his goal.</p><p>The talk with Yixing in that dried up park has given him a much clearer idea of what he can actually expect as the outcome to his confession. The gray prospect of rejection has easily turned into colorful hopes, maybe a tad too easily, but Kyungsoo finally has faith in himself and he won’t miss his chances anymore. </p><p>Baekhyun is the first one to arrive, it’s strange seeing him get in time anywhere, so it’s even weirder to have him walk around the apartment a good hour before the prearranged time. He’s as chirp and annoying as usual, dressed in bright violet and accompanied by that abomination of his fake Angelic Pretty bag. He poses it on the table with Kyungsoo’s ingredients, making sure he won’t miss it and then has the nerve to cry and moan when Kyungsoo shoves it to the floor.</p><p>“Stop treating <em> her </em> like this!” Baekhyun hugs the bag to his chest,</p><p>“<em>It </em>is going to be cut up and burned in a few hours anyways.” Kyungsoo puts on his cooking apron, an ugly baby blue cover that ties on the back and protects his front from his chest to his knees as well as his arms.</p><p>Kyungsoo points at the tower of baking trays on the table in front of Baekhyun, the latter passes them on as he speaks “It’s cute that you’re trying to convince me that you won’t be all up on each other the moment Yixing walks in.” </p><p>“How would that be different from what we’ve done until now?” Kyungsoo shrugs and keeps under check the dopey grin he was about to break into </p><p>“Well, I know for a fact that it will be different,” Baekhyun circles the table and taps his long nails over its surface, trying to look smug “I have eyes and ears everywhere.” he says and widens his eyes, his white, fake eyelashes cover up his purple smokey eyes.</p><p>“You’re creepy.” Kyungsoo squints through his glasses, but opts for continuing his work, without giving too much weight to Baekhyun’s words. </p><p>“Do you need me to help?” Baekhyun walks past Kyungsoo and bends down to look at the lit insides of the oven, Kyungsoo has already put in the choux pastry to cook and soon he’ll have the pizza ready to go in too.</p><p>“You can go help Minseok in the living room.” Kyungsoo ships him away like you would with a six years old cousin, but Baekhyun doesn’t mind, he isn’t interested in cooking and if Kyungsoo had to involve him in the preparations it would probably do more harm than good, both to the food and to Baekhyun himself. </p><p>By seven he’s adding the finishing touches to his profiterole and an half hour before eight, he pulls the dough out of its warm cocoon and divides it in the baking pans, ready to drown it in condiments and then let the oven do the rest.</p><p>Kyungsoo looks at all his hard work paying off, he puts his hands on his hips and sighs contentedly. The contact between his palms and the rough material of his apron make him realize that he hasn’t dressed up yet, so before putting the pizza in the oven he scurries away and locks himself in the bathroom.</p><p>He puts in his contacts and starts concealing all the results of his intense stress and irregular habits, his dark bags, pimples and sins alike all disappear as he lathers makeup on his entire face, once he’s satisfied with the result, he moves onto his eyes. He lays down a pearlescent shade as a base and then blends a dark, blue on his lash line and in the crease of his eyelids, eventually connecting them in a dramatic winged out look. He scribbles white pencil in his lower lash line and then adds more blue and more shimmer, he looks horrendous until he glues his lashes on, once he does, his eyes reach the doll-like perfection he loves so dearly. After that he drowns himself in old lady-scented powder and tints his lips in a stark, dark blue.</p><p>He moves to his room and finally wears his beloved dress and a simple, waist long, hime style, black wig. A quick once over in the mirror and he’s ready.</p><p>He ends up starting to bake the pizza later than he would have liked because Chanyeol barreled through the door along side Yifan, Aarif and three huge bags filled with colourful packages of snacks and sweets that have caught his attention.</p><p>Kyungsoo looks anxiously over the group, expecting to see someone that isn’t there. </p><p>“Yixing and Roghao still had to work so they’ll come a bit later.”</p><p>He shakes the thought away and finally moves back to the kitchen to finish up his work. </p><p>The intercom is buzzing again a few minutes later, this time Jongdae, his girlfriend and Junmyeon trail inside, bringing alcohol and an old, beat up karaoke machine, Jongin is right behind them with his trusty box of D&amp;D equipment.</p><p>Kyungsoo tries to keep a cap on how much food his guests consume in the first hours, scared that the ones that haven’t arrived won’t find anything. Then the clock strikes nine, ten and then Kyungsoo stops caring.</p><p>He’s tipsy and leaning with Baekhyun against the mountain that is Yifan, half paying attention to the D&amp;D game he’s participating in and half staring listlessly at Minseok’s imitation of an antique french clock, moving his right foot in time with the hand of the seconds.</p><p>The possibility of Yixing not showing up hadn’t even crossed his mind, which in retrospect was a massive overlook on his part. Maybe Yixing needs more time to forgive him or perhaps Ronghao’s car was stuck in traffic, or they're celebrating somewhere else...</p><p>"-soo! Kyungsoo!” Kyungsoo jolts against Yifan’s shoulder at the sound of Junmyeon’s voice screaming his name “It’s your turn.” he continues calmly.</p><p>Kyungsoo looks at him and then turns to look at the five other people playing, he’s about to ask the dungeon master how did he end up fighting a chaotic evil red dragon all by himself, but then Jongdae screams from the other side of the room and steals all the attention,</p><p>“It’s working!” he stands up and points at the karaoke machine that Chanyeol is working on.</p><p>“Finally!” Baekhyun stands up and throws the papers of his game away, “I go first!” he tramples over the people that stand on his path and runs towards Jongdae to snatch the microphone out of his hand.</p><p>He goes heavy handed on the buttons as he chooses a song, they make loud cracking noises until Baekhyun finds his pick. Half of the room groans as the loud intro of An Cafe’s Cherry saku yuuki raises from the machine. Kyungsoo has never been able to digest the bright, sparkly melody, but Baekhyun is a great singer, he makes it impossible for Kyungsoo to deny him some heartfelt cheering, even though he always sings this song whenever he gets the chance.</p><p>Baekhyun is able to command everyone’s attention throughout the entire song, making them sing with him and dance; their rhythm falters and degenerates into laughter, when he straddles Chanyeol’s lap and their face takes the same heavily saturated shade of red of their short hair.</p><p>“Oh!” Chanyeol exclaims out of nowhere, clutching his buzzing phone in his hand, while the rest of the room is arguing about who should be the next one to sing “They’re here!” </p><p>Kyungsoo, on his way to being half-asleep, has a sudden boost of energy, even though he tries his hardest to not make the others notice.</p><p>Minseok leaves his seat and waddles to the front door, as Kyungsoo stops using Yifan to rest his back and gets off the floor, he walks towards the kitchen to warm up the leftover pizza. An excuse to have a few moments to himself, but also the result of his constant father-like worrying.</p><p>“Did we miss the countdown?” Kyungsoo hears Ronghao’s voice from the foyer, his hands move fast to pick a random pan and throw the pizza inside it,</p><p>“Worse, you missed Kyungsoo’s pizza.” Jongdae laughs from somewhere near the couch, followed by gasps of disappointment and a set of loud steps moving towards Kyungsoo at an alarming speed.</p><p>“Please tell me that’s not true!” Yixing grabs Kyungsoo’s shoulders from the back and shakes him around “I haven’t eaten anything, I’ll die if you don’t feed me!”</p><p>“Yes, yes! I’m heating up the leftovers,” Which is what he was about to do before Yixing pulled him away from the stove and turned him around.</p><p>“Wow!” How is he so lively at this time and after who knows how many hours of work? “A beauty! As always...” He forces him to spin again and Kyungsoo follows his desires with no complaints, too occupied with staring at Yixing’s tight clothes and too smitten with the cute dips of his dimples.</p><p>“Thank you,” Kyungsoo lets his arm fall limply at his side when Yixing lets it go “You look very beautiful too.”</p><p>“Five minutes until midnight!” Baekhyun shouts from the other room and Kyungsoo sees Yixing in front of him suddenly become stiff. </p><p>“I know, we have a lot to talk about,” Yixing takes Kyungsoo’s hand and intertwines his fingers with his, “But before that, I need to do something else.” he pulls Kyungsoo back into the living room. </p><p>Kyungsoo is dragged around without really understanding what is happening, his eyes settle easily on the sparkly bodysuit Yixing’s wearing. His heart makes a leap and climbs up to his throat, he feel his heartbeat thumping through him, from the top of his head to the tips of his toes.</p><p>Yixing takes the cheap, karaoke mic in his hand and Baekhyun kneels near the machine to pick a song. Kyungsoo looks at the scene with his eyebrows furrowed, he’s happy to hear Yixing sing, but he’s also a bit disappointed to not be able to talk to him immediately.</p><p>“I told you that I would have gotten it eventually,” A dry rendition of familiar rhythmic chords comes from the singing machine and Kyungsoo’s hands pose on his chest, his fingers digging into the fabric, like he needs to contain his heart from shooting out of his chest in time with Malice Mizer's Ma chérie.</p><p>Yixing smiles and swings form left to right following the tempo, Kyungsoo can’t keep his lips still as he starts singing, there’s no way he could contain the way his smile blossoms over his face at seeing his favorite person sing his favorite song. He's always been a bit embarrassed of being so attached to such a sentimental sounding song, but that doesn't even cross his mind now, all he can think about his the light, happy feeling flooding his chest. The tension, the worry all gone with a snap of Yixing’s fingers. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Ma cherie, are you missing me? </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The chorus hits and the entire room sings with him, Kyungsoo laughs and sings with them too, but he also starts feeling the pressure of being put on the spot in this way, especially when Yixing keeps staring at him with such a dazzling, blinding smile.</p><p>Kyungsoo is so in love with him, it’s unbearable. Almost as much as his crocodile embossed, faux leather pants.</p><p>Yixing keeps moving closer to him, he stops only when the wire of the microphone is about to snap out of the machine, but instead of giving up he extends an arm and silently asks him to take his hand. In response, Kyungsoo shakes his head and gets his feet on the couch as well, rolling into a ball and wishing this overwhelming joy could make him disappear, but soon the entire room is clapping their hands and telling him to take it.</p><p>It takes more convincing, but Kyungsoo does stand up eventually and graps tightly Yixing’s hand, his heart is rushing, all the blood being pumped runs to his face and to his ears, he feels scorching hot everywhere, bashful and so stupidly happy.</p><p>Yixing forces him to dance with him as they both sing into the microphone, even though they ruin their duet with goofy laughters and snarky retorts to their friends’ taunting. </p><p>The song comes to the guitar solo and Yixing poses his forehead on Kyungsoo’s “I never want to argue with you again.” He says and Kyungsoo nods, lays his hands on his waist,</p><p>“Me neither.” Kyungsoo closes his eyes and is more than ready to shout his confession and finally tie everything together with a happy ending.</p><p>“Ten seconds!” Baekhyun scurries on his feet and leaps towards Yixing and Kyungsoo with his hands ready to grab their heads “Fucking kiss! I’m about to lose!” he shouts and Kyungsoo pulls back from Yixing, listening nervously to Junmyeon and Minseok’s drunken countdown.</p><p>5, 4, 3 and Yixing grabs Kyungsoo’s head with both of his hands and kisses him “We’re one hundred percent boyfriends!” he announces and hugs Baekhyun when he throws himself on him, shouting in glee. </p><p>The countdown hits zero and Jongdae opens the bottle of discount champagne, the cork grazes just barely the top of Kyungsoo’s head who’s still fixed on his spot, looking at Yixing in shock. Yixing smiles sweetly at then clenches his jaw and hits Kyungsoo’s shoulder</p><p>“I sing your favorite song, dance with you, I give you the best atmosphere to finally confess and what do you do?!” Yixing leans over Kyungsoo and glares at him at one centimeter from his face “You pull back?”</p><p>“No, Yixing, that’s not what it was,” Kyungsoo is a bit panicked as he tries to calm him down, “We had a stupid bet going on, so…”</p><p>“I happen to know a lot about a certain bet…” Yixing interrupts him, “And I really didn’t want you to win. Honestly...” he takes Kyungsoo’s hand and starts pulling him around again “I’m offended that you were betting against us getting together.”</p><p>He had to listen to Yixing putting things into perspective to truly understand how dumb the entire thing was and how even if he ended up winning, it would have still felt like a loss. </p><p>Yixing keeps grumbling as he pushes open the door of Kyungsoo’s room. Once they’re inside, Kyungsoo frees himself from Yixing’s grip and instead lays his own tight hold on Yixing’s wrist. Kyungsoo twirls them around and pins Yixing to the wall, he slams his perfectly manicured hand on the side of his head with a loud thumping sound. Yixing is startled, but instead of jolting away, he shivers lightly and stays in place.</p><p>“That was hot,” he starts, but Kyungsoo ignores it,</p><p>“Yixing,” the saliva he gulps down hydrates his dry throat enough to let him keep speaking “I really, really like you…” The intentions were good, but the word <em> like </em>sounded more like an “L” followed by a death rattle.</p><p>“You what?” Kyungsoo knows Yixing’s understood him, but of course he would press</p><p>“I like you. A lot. Will you go out with me?” Kyungsoo pushes everything out, cringing at the desperation in his voice.</p><p>Yixing smiles, his hands pose on Kyungsoo’s shoulder, “I would love to.” He’s so sweet, the touch of his hands feels so gentle and the way in which his lips curl and his dimples deepen is adorable. Yixing tilts his head to kiss him and Kyungsoo closes his eyes, thinking of how much he tastes like honey. </p><p>“Of course, I would… Only last week, I’ve confessed like... Five times.” He raises his hands, making himself look like a feline ready to catch a prey; Kyungsoo raises his eyes to look at him, the few centimeters of height difference between them could make him look menacing, but there’s no chance of it working on Kyungsoo, who’s stuck thinking about how lovely he is.</p><p>Needless to say, Yixing’s words take a while to really settle in, but once they do, they prove to be enough to unblock Kyungsoo and put his jaw on the floor “You? What?”</p><p>“Yes! Kyungsoo, yes!” He’s stomping his feet, he’s so frustrated and he looks so fucking cute “How many times do you need to hear me say that I like you and that I only want to be with you?!”</p><p>“So… You actually meant everything you’ve been saying?” Kyungsoo replays in his mind all of Yixing's straightforward clues that he had just written off as vague jokes. He pinches his arm, just to see if that will make him wake up in his bed.</p><p>“Yes! Are you really this oblivious?!” Yixing’s frustration dies down, his exaggerated anger is washed away with it and substituted by an heartbreaking touch of sadness “The other night, before coming to your house, Baekhyun told me you were going to finally tell me… Instead I get there and <em> that </em>comes out of your mouth…” he moves off the wall and wraps himself tightly around Kyungsoo.</p><p>Kyungsoo grimaces, physically pained by hearing that “I’m so sorry, Yixing.” Kyungsoo whispers and adjusts carefully in Yixing’s hug as it becomes even tighter.</p><p>“After thinking about it the next day, I realized that there was no way you meant for it to sound that way. So, I’m sorry as well... But we can stop that now, we've apologized three times each already.” Yixing chuckles and kisses his cheek, Kyungsoo feels something wet spread on his skin, the familiar sensation of lipstick smearing “If I knew it was going to take this long, I would have just taken the lame confession you wheezed out at my house.”</p><p> Kyungsoo pulls himself out of the hug, his forehead creases, “You were awake?!”</p><p>“Have you ever met anyone that falls asleep in two seconds?” Yixing strolls through the room, aiming for the bed.</p><p>“Lame?!” Kyungsoo adds, still trying to keep up with everything Yixing's telling him. An offended expression takes over his features “You know I’m bad with words, that was big for me.”</p><p>“How come you always find the words to badmouth my clothes, then?” Yixing sits on Kyungsoo’s bed and glares at him, </p><p>“Because your fashion taste sucks! You pull them out of me!” Kyungsoo shrugs and walks over too. He leans over the bed, Yixing's back lays down as Kyungsoo poses his palms on the bed and presses forward.</p><p>Yixing puts up his hands and holds a firm grip on the back of Kyungsoo’s head, he pulls him close, until the tips of their noses brush against each other and their lips touch. The kiss isneedy and clumsy, it pulls laughter out of both of them.</p><p>“What about... When you said that it wasn’t meant to be serious?” Kyungsoo asks, unsure and breathy, one last flame of uncertainty to put out,</p><p>“I meant that you didn’t have to be that serious about Baekhyun gossiping,” Yixing scoots on the bed until he’s laying properly and can pull Kyungsoo down with him “When Chanyeol told me, all I could think of was that I could finally make out with you everywhere I pleased.”</p><p>Kyungsoo lies down on top of Yixing, his head burrowing in his chest, “I feel kinda dumb.” he confesses, prompting Yixing to pull himself up and force Kyungsoo to kneel in front of him.</p><p>“From now on, whatever doubt we have,” Yixing touches his cheeks “We’ll be able to clear them up any time. No more silent worrying,”</p><p>“Okay.” Kyungsoo gets to all fours and hovers over Yixing,</p><p>“If we panic, we panic together.” They both laugh lightly at that, the vicinity easily turns into kissing and the moment Yixing’s hands start to sneak up Kyungsoo’s thighs, Kyungsoo takes the executive decision of undressing, he’ll protect his dress at any cost when he’s the one wearing it, because he dreads imagining what it’ll happen to it when Baekhyun will get his greedy hands on it.</p><p>They’re both silent as Kyungsoo leaves his dress on his chair and Yixing struggles to get his skin tight pants off himself. Eventually, Kyungsoo has to intervene pushing and pulling among Yixing’s giggling. Kyungsoo is left with a wig, a bralette, a pair of bloomers and white thigh highs, meanwhile Yixing is just wearing the body suit and Kyungsoo has no doubts that he isn’t wearing anything else under that.</p><p>Yixing rolls on his front and looks up at Kyungsoo, he raises a hand, waiting for him to take it. Kyungsoo does just that and then gets back on the bed, he kisses the back of the hand in his hold before letting it go and move his own fingers to dig into Yixing’s firm side. They’ve been in this same situation so many times before, yet tonight feels different, it’s the giddiness of a first time paired with the comfort that comes from being able to openly express feelings that have been kept hidden until now.</p><p>Yixing turns to face Kyungsoo “Wig on or off?” he asks and Kyungsoo hums, his hands smooth over the length of Yixing’s wide back,</p><p>“Off.” he decides, Yixing has the habit of pulling his hair, he doesn’t mind it when it’s on his own hair, but it’s a bit more difficult to indulge it when one pull equals to tens of hairpins pulling your scalp at the same time.</p><p>Yixing busies himself with the process of taking Kyungsoo’s wig off while Kyungsoo leaves a trail of kisses down his chest, soon settling on his perky nipples, both his hands and his lips tease them, hindrancing Yixing’s serious work.</p><p>Once the long wig is off, Kyungsoo feels even more naked, but his horniness doesn’t give him the peace of mind to care for it. All he can focus on is Yixing under him, with his thighs spread open and flushed in the face.</p><p>The impulse is stronger than his reason as Kyungsoo nears his fingers to Yixing’s crotch, he lays feather-like touches over the outline of his dick, observes quietly as it slowly fills up under the flimsy layer of shimmering fabric. Before opening it up, he moves it aside, just to peek at what Yixing’s keeping between his legs.</p><p>“Let’s do it raw?” Yixing's words take a questioning tilt, while he folds his legs over his chest, leaving himself shamelessly open. Kyungsoo knows it’s not responsible, but he nods anyways and when he bends down to open the last drawer under his desk he only pulls out his almost empty bottle of unscented lube.</p><p>Yixing’s right hand is circling slowly over his dick, he continues even as Kyungsoo unfastens the clasps holding the body suit together. It pops open and Yixing sighs, finally letting his hand under the fabric and touching himself directly. </p><p>Kyungsoo leaves a dollop of the viscous liquid over his crotch, Yixing catches some of it as it drips down to his hole and uses it to make his touches smoother.</p><p>Kyungsoo groans and Yixing uses his free hand to pull at his bloomers, dragging them down enough to let his dick out of them. They’re usually so vocal, instead tonight they’ve been almost completely silent, basking in mutual understanding that doesn’t need words or explicit commands. The same quiet mixture of groans and moans continues as Kyungsoo enters Yixing.</p><p>Their foreheads touch and their kissing steadily becomes deeper, more intense and demanding, until Kyungsoo drags his cock out and Yixing’s lips part in a breathy moan, gasping for oxygen after the stimulation on his rim forces all the air out of his system.    </p><p>Kyungsoo tries to straighten up to get a better angle but Yixing doesn’t let him, he winds himself around him and keeps him between his arms tightly. The hold becomes shallow as Kyungsoo nails his prostate the first time, the thrust has Yixing screaming and surprisingly his hands move quickly to cover his mouth. It seems that even an exhibitionist has limits and Yixing’s seem to be linked to fucking just one room away from their nosy best friends. </p><p>“Don’t cover it,” Kyungsoo whispers, his own deep voice is rough and strained, he takes the hand covering Yixing’s lips in his and keeps it secured in his grasp. Yixing’s eyes close shut when Kyungsoo moves again, </p><p>“I’m close…” Yixing bites his lower lip, still trying to keep his volume down, Kyungsoo lowers towards it and bites on it too, snatching it away from Yixing’s teeth to kiss and soothe it. </p><p>The pace of his hips stutters, he shivers as the pressure starts building in his core. Both his and Yixing’s breathing become loud and ragged.</p><p>Yixing poses a hand on Kyungsoo’s chest making him stop, Kyungsoo is so close and Yixing is so tight around him, but he listens and doesn’t put up a fight when Yixing pushes him down and sits on his dick. Both of them moan louder than they should have, but Yixing doesn’t seem to be worried about it anymore as he throws his head back and lets his light voice break into that nice tone, raw tone that Kyungsoo loves hearing so much. </p><p>Kyungsoo grasps his hips and fucks into him harder than before, Yixing bounces on his lap and pulls what’s left of his clothing over his head; he sighs out in bliss, completely naked and looking infuriatingly sexy and absolutely satisfied. </p><p>Kyungsoo can’t believe he’s really all his. </p><p>From the tip of his dick drips precome nonstop, he’s so wet and ready, but Kyungsoo only offers him a loose fist for friction. Yixing whines, the sound is deep and throaty, oozing frustration. To get closer to his release, he pinches his chest and plays with his sensitive nipples and the metal piercing through them, just the sight of that is enough to get Kyungsoo to blow off.</p><p>“Inside?” Kyungsoo asks and Yixing nods vigorously, still bouncing, still pinching his chest and gritting his teeth. Kyungsoo takes pity on him and starts touching his dick with clearer intent, the hold is strong and his movements are fast. In matter of seconds, Yixing is trembling, grasping Kyungsoo’s hair and his shoulders and drowning him in sweet, messy kisses.</p><p>They both come moments away from each other. Kyungsoo’s chest feels incredibly full, no one has ever made him feel like this, at ease but still on edge, satisfied but also ready to go again. Yixing is chaos and confusion, the perfect fit for his straight-laced tastes. The right amount of spice he had been craving so desperately and at the same time, the soothing hand keeping him close and reassuring him.</p><p>Yixing is perfect for him and he’s so glad, that his fears and thoughs of running away never truly succeded over the real feelings he harbors for him. To be fair, he's not sure he could have made it without the friends he has close, maybe Baekhyun does deserve to wear his most expensive dress once in a while. </p><p>Talk of the devil, Kyungsoo’s door creaks open and light from the other side creeps into his dark room in a stark line.</p><p>“You done? I need my dress.” Baekhyun walks in with a hand covering his eyes, Kyungsoo pulls the covers from his right and covers Yixing and himself,</p><p>“It’s not yours.” Kyungsoo says as Baekhyun walks out with the dress in his hand.</p><p>Yixing laughs light-heartedly and pushes himself deeper into the covers, snuggling up between Kyungsoo’s arms. </p><p>“Baekhyun got my dress, what did he promise you for helping him?” Kyungsoo asks and puts his chin on top of Yixing’s head,</p><p>“He didn’t need to promise me anything,” Yixing hugs Kyungsoo’s waist, his hands play with the elastic keeping his stockings up on his thighs “I already have my prize, <em> ma chérie</em>.” he delivers the line without a hint of shame.</p><p>“Gross.” Kyungsoo loves him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>❀ thank you to the mods for being patient with me and thank you for reading, for the kudos and comments!<br/>im @gothxingsoo on twitter hmu ❀</p>
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